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Who determines what is polite and what isn't? How does everyone begin to acknowledge these "rules"? (link)
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this is a very complex question. in the grand scheme of things it is learned culture and social norms that tell you what is polite and what isn't. just because they are norms does not mean they are "correct" "moral" or "right."
People acknowledge these rules through what is called identification- which is implicitly understanding a norm through exposure of other people practicing it, and in turn practicing it yourself. When you practice it yourself, you believe it is "right" even if it isn't. This is usually an unconscious thing. This process of identification as culture through learning goes with almost everything we do in our lives, you may not think about how you know what you know or why, but this is why.
To learn more, I suggest you read Van Elst's "Culture as Given, Culture as Choice."
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