Gender: Female
Member Since: April 14, 2006
Answers: 7
Last Update: April 19, 2006
Visitors: 1726
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Anyway, whenever I drive with my parents in the car there always yelling at me, speed up, watch out, your gonna crash. They need to realize that I'm already nervous. All there doing is fueling the flame. They've gotten so nervous they haven't even let me drive for about a month now. Thing is i've never crashed and I know I'm not that bad of a driver. They say they expect me to get my liscence next year. I'll be 16. What do I do? (link)
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When I was 16 and learning to drive, I went through a similar experience with my mother. She would put on her seat belt with a resigned look on her face, as if she felt she were going to die that day under my watch.
Then, if I made any turn, she'd hold onto the the handle in the inside of the passenger side door and brace herself as if we were going to crash. She also reduced me to tears by second-guessing my every move.
I had to tell her this:
1)I have never made a mistake.
2)If you shout out stuff and you make me nervous and distract me, YOU COULD CAUSE ME TO HAVE AN ACCIDENT. And it will be YOUR FAULT.
3)You will not live forever and you need to realize that you can't baby me forever.
4)I take driving seriously and I know that driving badly risks my life, the life of my passengers, and the lives of others on the road.
I am a responsible person in many areas of my life and just because you have memories of me as a helpless baby unable to feed himself/herself, does not mean that I am frozen in time like that forever.
5)Finally, you are being disrespectful. How would you like it if while you were driving, I criticized every thing you did? Before you made every turn, I told you to do it? Would you be happy?
If you tell your parents this (gently), they might wake up to the fact that they're being obnoxious. And they're not helping you learn.
Now that I am an adult, I have one rule for my parents- particularly my mother. You are riding as a passenger in my car. Your house, your rules; my car my rules. If you do not like my driving and say so, I will drop you off at the nearest store or gas station and have you call dad to pick you up. I will not tolerate a backseat driver in my car, is that understood? I have never had to put this ultimatum to her ever again.
Best of luck,
Old Mongoose.
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