Gender:
FemaleLocation:
Chicago, ILAge:
29Member Since:
March 16, 2006Answers:
45Last Update:
August 7, 2006Visitors:
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advice
Me and my boyfriend have been together for alomost a year & a half. We are (were) supposed to get married next month. Last night we were talking and he told me something that he had been holding in since last summer that he wanted to get off his chest. I was pregnant last summer and miscarried, he told me he doesnt believe I was ever pregnant. This has hurt me so much, we are not little kids, in fact I am older than him (21 & 23) I would not make up such a horrible story, I was crushed when it happened and still cry at night sometimes when I think about it. He says he cant marry me till he has proof. Getting "proof" isnt a problem, but i feel now as though I cant marry him becuase he doesnt trust me and Ive always been told if you dont have trrust you dont have nothin. I Love him more than I could ever say and the thought of losing him upsets me to no end, but at that same time i feel so betrayed by him like im some kind of monster that would make up a story like that. What should I do? please help Ill rate!!
Miscarriage is such a sensitive issue to begin with...I, myself, miscarried with my last boyfriend, and at the time it happened, we were split up. When I told him about it, he thought I was making it up to put some sort of guilt on him for the way things ended with us. I wasn't even together with him and the pain he caused me by saying that, thinking I'd make it up JUST to do it, was unbearable. To think that the man I am engaged to wants PROOF of my miscarriage before he marries me just blows my mind.
As it's been said, if you don't have trust, you have nothing. I can see why you're doing some real serious thinking. I would be tempted to tell him to go to hell. You should not have to obtain any proof. Your word should be good for him as you're supposed to be the woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with. You need to make that very clear to him. Rough situation, girl, and I'm really sorry you're going through it. My best suggestion is to go with your gut, no matter how rough of a ride it'll be. Good luck.
(Rating: 5) yea, your right...The hard part is doing something I dont think I have the guts to do. Were supposed to get married April 4th. He hasnt mentioned anything else about it.. so i dont know if what I said to him really changed his mind or if he understands where I was comin from & still doesnt believe me and decided to just let it go and I dont want to ask him either b/c to me, it's "stirrin' shit" but at the same time I do wanna' know.