Dear Santa,
You must be surprised that im writing to you today, the 25th of December. Well, i would very much like to clear up certain things that have occurred since the beginning of the month, when, filled with illusion, i wrote you my letter. I asked for a bicycle, an electric train setm a pair of roller blades, and a football uniform. I destroyed my brain studying the whole year. Not ONLY was i the first in my class, but i had the best grades in the school. Im not going to lie to you, there was no one in my ENTIRE neighborhood that behaved better than me, with my parents, my brothers, my friends, and with my neighbors. I would go on errands, and even help the elderly cross the street. There was virtually nothing within reach that i would not do for humanity. WHAT BALLS YOU HAVE KEAVING ME A FUCKING YOYO, A LAME WHISTLE, AND A PAIR OF UGLY SOCKS. WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING, YOU FAT PRICK, THAT YOU'VE TAKEN ME FOR A SUCKER THE WHOLE FUCKING YEAR TO COME OUT WITH SOME SHIT LIKE THIS UNDER MY TREE. As if you haven't fucked me enough, you gave that little quiff across the street so many toys he cant that he cant walk in his house. Dont let me see you trying to fit your big fat ass down my chimney next year. Ill fuck you up. Ill throw rocks at those stupid reinderr and scare them away so you'll have to walk back to the fuck North Pole, just like what i have to do now since you didnt get me that fucking bike. FUCK YOU SANTA. Next year you'll find out how bad i can be, you FAT COCKSUCKER.
Sincerly,
Little Johnny
All I can say is, I'm sorry I dissapointed you. But someone with such language use must clearly not have been the best they could've been all year, I doubt you would've been able to hold it in.
Kay, maybe next year.
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Dont even give me the vocabulary lecture. Like i said, i was the best kid on the block. I better see some gifts under my tree next year mister. =)
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