I'm a fourteen year old girl looking to help you people out. Leave me questions and i can try my best to answer them.
I love the Redsox. they make me so happy. lol
Ok, i'm not into that whole bf/gf thing, so unless you really like me or something weird like that, don't ask me those stupid does he like me questions. i can almost garentee you're not going to like your answer.
i'm a little crazy, but for the most part, i'm not going to screw with you guys like with jokes when it comes to advice.
Gender: Female
Location: Boston Ma.
Occupation: Writer Looking to be published
Age: 14
AIM: Tucanfullofholes
Member Since: July 26, 2004
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I wasn't sure what category to put this under by recently my girlfriend / best friend and I just lost our virginity to each other. It was amazing. But then the next night, I get a phone call from her brother saying to go the hospital because my girlfriend's just been raped...by her father. I didn't know what to do, so i just froze and went after her father. I beat the crap out of him and broke my hand. I know that wasn't smart but what he did to her was less smart. He's been abusing her since about the age of 4, I was one of the few people who knew this. She didn't want ANYONE telling the police because her father threatened her. And she didn't want to run away and leave her little sister with her father for fear he might hurt her too.
Well anyway, back on topic, her father went to jail and everyone testified against him. So he'll be in there for a LONG time. My problem is, my girlfriend is still in shock over this. We tried to have sex a few weeks later but she was so scared and still thinks about the rape. I'm not frustrated about the no-sex part AT ALL believe me. But what I'm wondering is if there's anything I can do for her to make her get over this. I want her to be happy again. I love her with all my heart and hate seeing her like this.
Any girls who have been raped, you could probably help me most on this. How did you get over it? Thanks SO much! (link)
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ok, well stop having sex with her first of all. thats just not going to help the problem at all what so ever in the history of helping out a rape victem. She's going to be scared for a very very long time. please don't break up with her, that would be earth shattering for her.
tell her you love her with all your heart. she's going to definately want to hear that. don't do anything sexual, but letting her cry on your shoulder and hugging is probably as far as you should go for a while. You NEED to be there for her, which i'm sure you already are. let her call you at all hours so on and so forth.
maybe even taking her to therapy might help her. like a school counciler or something. any one. she might need help after something as tramatic as that.
you're not responcible, though i understand why you would feel that way. you are not the one who raped her, so you can't be responcible. the only person who is responcible is her father.
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Rating: 5
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I am going to stop having sex with her until she says SHE is ready. Thank you for your advice, I really appreciate it.
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