Member Since: November 19, 2009
Answers: 1
Last Update: November 19, 2009
Visitors: 488
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I am an 18 year old male and I have been a pretty emotionally dead person for...well since my early childhood. And when I say dead I don't mean depressed or really down or anything of that nature. It's nearly impossible for me to feel anything genuine and I can only put a mask of fakeness on so I don't seem so far out. When I was in a psychology class I read about something called anti-social personality disorder and it almost disturbed me how similar the symptoms were to my own character. I've done enough to put myself away for the better half of my life and I haven't felt a shred of remorse or conscience. Anyways, I'm wondering if my lack of emotion is a cause of concern. Nothing brings me joy, pain, or sorrow and I can't even feel love for my own family anymore. NOTHING will make me feel anything and it bothers me. All I feel like is a body and a brain without a soul. Something is wrong with me but I don't know what. I'm a very intelligent person and all it seems I can do is succeed with material things like work while my relationships are built on false pretenses and emotions I never even felt but acted like I did. My question is: If there is anybody somewhat educated about this...what could be wrong with me? Do I have anti-social personality disorder?...and am I stuck with this? (link)
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well i mean , i started off like that . happy and all that . One day it was my birthday and i woke up not happy . So .. that's when everything started going . If I do not put on a happy face , then my friend will think i'm sad or something . That's when it bugs me and plus when i put on my act it seems more easier . Like im not away from society , and people would like me more because im regular. Like i had a phase for a couple of weeks . about a 1 month and a half where i acted like me ,and i wouldn't really do stuff with people . Like someone died or something and i was still in shock , but no one died and i wasn't in shock it was like me to me not me to society but people thought i was weird so my friends stopped talking to me a bit and such . I'm always deep in thought . i give things much thought about everything , every single second of my life im thinking about this and that , and if not im going to be reading . I think when i put myself out there im making myself a much bigger fool then keepig myself to me because when i talk there's like really no point since im thinking about what to say . it should be a reflex not soemthing to think-and-do . i hardly get angry anymore and when i do it'd be a little spark and i'd chill out . I mean .. i think i lost my anger too :/ . i can tell when people are faking their laughter when im talking . i told my friend abt my ' disorder ' and then we were talking abt it again , and she forget what it meant AND !! she forgot i even had it ... I cann say i have suchhh great friends .. ( sarcasm added )
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