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Member Since: July 6, 2011
Answers: 9
Last Update: August 20, 2017
Visitors: 1698


I'm a person who avoids conflict and I hate rude people because when they're rude to me I end up crying and thinking about it the whole day. Today a customer came up to me and asked how much a product was but in order to answer that I asked him which product because there was 3 different ones of the same one. Then he said did you hear what I said? I said no because I didn't want to explain why I asked which product cause I'm not much of a talker then he went on and said "in school do you listen to your teacher?" And I said yes then he said well then if you can't hear somebody you'll tell them to speak up I said "ok" so I selected a random product for him and told him the price then he said "I don't want that one I want the regular one" okay wtf then you should've answered that when I asked (of course I didn't say that) I said okay I told him the price of the regular one but as I was saying it he added somethings else but the only thing I could think of was him insulting me so then I asked him to clarify what he meant. Then he rolled his eyes and said see you're not listening again I said I wanted this and that. So then I said okay, I gave him his order and then he asked me if English was my first language I said yes. And he said "wow" and walked away. That completely ruined my day and I ended up crying and had a panic attack I also had to leave work early cause that's all I could think of. How do I deal with rude customers and not take it personally? Or what's a way to be polite but rude at the same time so that the customer can't report me to the manager. I'm 18 btw with social anxiety (it's gotten better but as you can see I can't handle conflict I don't know how I'd deal if it was more than one customer today) (link)
I used to be the exact same way. I was young, avoided conflict like the plague, and was sweet to everyone. My self esteem was very low though. I was so nice to everyone because I didn't want anyone to hate me like I hated myself. I'm very sensitive too and suffer from anxiety and panic attacks, so if I got bullied by a customer it was not unusual to find me locked in the bathroom sobbing.
I hate that this is the answer, but I got A LOT better with time and experience. There's no real secret to dealing with it. It comes naturally for some people who don't have self esteem issues or who are good at not caring what rude things customers have to say. But for others like me, it's something we must work on because unfortunately, that's our job.
BUT on the other hand, know when something is above your pay grade. If someone is treating you far too bad, know when to stop and say "Okay it seems we aren't getting anywhere, let me go ahead and call my manager over to help us," or what have you. If they don't like the policy you just explained and won't accept it, offer to call the manager. It's the managers job to be there for you with these customers, so take advantage of that. Being low on the totem pole means you don't make the rules, you follow them.
For the small scenarios I will call on experienced coworkers. If you work with someone who's been there for years, run it by them. You may know the policy up and down but some customers don't want to hear your answer, so they want to talk to someone else who will give them their yes. They think someone else will bend the policy for them (makes me roll my eyes lol).
For example, when I worked at a gas station, people very frequently got upset about our prepay pumps. They could not pump then pay. They would always pull the "well I came here a month ago and someone let me do it" (they probably went to another station, our systems CANNOT do pump then pay, physically impossible) so I said "I'm sorry, it's been that way for a long time, we physically can't do it." and they for whatever reason didn't believe me. So I would call over Greg who worked there for 10 years and ask him "Is there anyway to avoid the prepay for our pumps?" Greg would say "None whatsoever. I've worked here for 10 years and it cannot be done." And hearing it from 2 employees helped the customer see, well this won't go anywhere, and accept the answer. 1/10 may still not hear it, so that's when you call the manager. You've done all you could, call in the big guns ;)
It helped me after a while to laugh it off. Think about how "wow, this guys life sucks so bad he has to yell at a nice gas station lady to blow off some steam," and think about how you always try your best for people. There is NOTHING else you could have done. Or if you made a mistake, everyone does! You apologized and were as nice as you could be, and fixed it. If someone is still screaming at you for it, that's their problem.
I did not get this way over night. Years of customer service slicing my heart and scabbing it over helped me look at everything with my job logically, not emotionally. You have anxiety like me, which is very unfortunate but for our quality of life, it must be worked on and you must learn how to make it okay. If it simply becomes too much, if you try and try and it's just too hurtful, try another line of work. Factory work doesn't require customer service skills, but it has its own pros and cons. Some people are more aligned with that, like my husband :)
Me, I know I have a knack for customer service because I'm friendly. But with that friendlines comes a sensitive heart. Just know if you decide to work on it, it gets a lot better. Just be patient with yourself, it takes a long time to change things about you, even if they're for the better :) Hope I helped somewhat


Rating: 5
Thank you :)




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