Bio♥
Hey, I'm Melody! I've been giving advice on and off since 2003. I'm a 23 year old military wife, expecting a baby boy in August, and working on my Bachelor's degree. :)
Oh, and ask me anything!
Advice
From what I know oral sex is- handjobs blowjobs fingering ect.
Please correct me if I'm wrong.
- I have tlked to my parents about sex and they tell me to wait till marriage when they say wait they mean " oral" to. Well I'm still figureing myself out and I'm not going to take place in sexual activity in till it's right for me weather that is before or after marriage I really don't know. My family and I strongly believe in god. However my older siblings have boyfriends and my parents don't want them in the same bed togeather. They disagree with why my parents say and it has an effect on the way I think about sex "and waiting ect." I don't believe that it
sisters have waited to have oral in fact I REALLy don't think they have. This confuses me cause my parents tell me one thing but my sisters do another. I just wanna no how you feel about this and what I should do it's really bothering and confusing me. I'm getting at a age were I wanna be prepared on how far I wanna go.
The person below me if right. Oral sex refers to sex involving the mouth. So from your list, only blowjobs are considered oral. Men can also perform oral sex on women in a similar fashion.
Sex is confusing. I can completley understand why you feel conflicted since your family seems to be pulling you in all different directions. The important thing to remember is when it comes to sex it is YOUR decision, and yours alone.
It's good that your parents have talked to you about sex. They obviously care about you and your well-being. Did they talk to you about birth control as well? I think even if parents promote abstinence to their children, they should still discuss the consequences of sex, birth control, and at least touch on all aspects of what happens if you wait or don't wait (good or bad).
The thing about your sisters is this: your parents probably told them the same things they told you, but your sisters have chosen not to take their advice on abstinence (assuming they are sexually active). Like the person below me said, just because your sisters are having sex doesn't mean you have too.
If you are confused then you obviously aren't ready. That's fine. Don't have sex because everyone else is doing it. Contrary to what you think, a lot more people are abstinent then what you may think.
Your religious. That's cool. It doesn't have to affect whether or not you have sex or not. It's a lot more complicated then, "God says don't have sex so I won't." When you meet a guy you honestly love the decision gets a little messy. It's not so black and white anymore.
My advice is don't turn this into some big deal. Don't set an age or time limit, because then if you don't live up to it you may feel like you've failed. You shouldn't look at it like that. When you meet a guy and fall in love, after being in a committed relationship reassess your situation. How do you feel? If you are scared, timid, already wondering if you will regret the decision, etc., then you probably still aren't ready. If you only have slight jitters (which is normal) and you are honestly exited about the experience, then you are probably ready.
I will leave you with this cliche: When you are ready, you will just know. :)
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(Rating: 4) Thanks, I think I'm going to have to just wait till I find someone I love to figure this out.