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FemaleLocation:
TennesseeAge:
16Member Since:
October 27, 2007Answers:
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Okay. I'm a fourteen year old girl and my boyfriend is sixteen (we'll call himm T). We've been dating for a little over three months. I've been hurt in past relationships... a guy only wanted me because he thought he could bang me. But he's the past. I love my boyfriend now. About two months ago I found out something a little shocking. So he used to date this girl (we'll call her B) and I haaaaate her. She goes to a different school, and even before i knew my bf,i severly disliked this girl. I'm not gonna lie though, since ive been dating T ive disliked her even more. I always have thiss problem of comparing myself with her... it sucks. So when i found out that he had fingered her while they were dating it really upset me. Because T promised me, before we started to date, that we would take things reellay slow. Yeah well here I go being stupid and comparing myself. T is perfect. He said that he regretted doing that with her, and that he doesn't expect anything like that from me, he wants to do only what I'm comfortable with. But I really like him... And I don't want to lose him like I did with that otheer guy. Whatever, no excuse. I let him finger me tonight. And now I just don't know... After he did that things were awesome. I felt happy and good about it, and we cuddled and joked around and it was perfect. Then I left his house and we started texting. He was being short with me, and he said he was just tired. I don't know. I was going to call him but he fell asleep... but I really need to talk to him. Truth is, I regret letting hiim finger me. I wish I hadn't... And this sucks because what if he regrets it too? I don't know. I don't know what to do and I'm really confused and I just feel like crying right now but I love him and I just need some help... And the worst part is, I feel like I can't talk to my friends about it. They wouldn't understand... They'd be shocked that I did somthing like that. I know its wiered but they're such good girls and I was too and maybe I still am but I feel so dirty...
You aren't dirty. You shouldn't be ashamed of this. It's something normal that most people our age (i'm 16) do. You need to talk to your best friend. Because he/she is going to be the one that understands you the most, and is going to be the one that is there for you through everything, and if they can't accept you for who you are or the mistakes you make, then they aren't good friends anyway. I know you may not want to hear this, but If your boyfriend had been telling you that you don't have to do anything you don't want to, but he already did this to you.. Then he may not care as much as you think he does. He's not perfect. No one is perfect.
Many girls compare themselves to their boyfriend's girl best friends, or ex girlfriends because they are insecure or scared. You don't have anything to worry about. As long as he isn't cheating, or talking to this other girl like he talks to you, then don't stress so much over it. You are who you are, and he obviously likes you because he is going out with you. But I think that you need to call him or talk to him in person about this, and tell him how you feel. Tell him that you aren't really comfortable doing things like this, and see how he takes it. If he doesn't, then he's not the right one for you.
I hope this helps:)
Please feel free to ask me anything further on my page. I'd love to help.
Kaila(:.
This is a reply to your feedback:
Well, talk to your boyfriend first. You don't have to tell your friend if you don't want to.. But if you ever need someone to talk to about all of this, go to them. Make sure it's okay with your boyfriend first. But, you can't let him make every decision for you.
(Rating: 4) But I think I still want to do this... I wanted him to and I still to... but should I really tell my friend?? Isn't this somthing personal? Like I don't know if my bf would really like it if I didn't keep it between us.