askAucunu
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Q: 25 yr/F
Hello. I feel as if I have a problem b/c most other people have many friends that they can hang out and party with. I sometimes find myself alone bored wanting to go out on a Friday night. I have a wonderful husband and a son which make me very happy. The area of my life that I feel I am lacking in are my friends. I think that a lot of times in the past I have been misunderstood and some girls just don't like me. I've had girls hate me because they think that I am one way when really I am another. I have two best friends, but honestly we don't get to hang out much and one of them just moved away to another state. I just need to know what I can do to make new friends or meet new people. I want to be open and inviting, but I feel as if I'm doing too much and I don't want to be looked at like I'm a weirdo. I'm tired of asking friends to hang out only to be let down when it doesn't happen or they change their minds at the last minute. This really makes me feel like a loser. While some people have childhood friends they can call on, I don't because my mom moved my family around almost every year until I was about 12. So, those bonds and long relationships I never got the chance to create. I feel like I can count on one hand the amount of friends I have and I just wanna go out and have fun.
Ah, I completely hear you on the subject of moving/childhood friends. I had the same situation as you. I found that because I did move so often, I learned how to make friends easily for the short-term, but didn't learn the skills to maintain these. I'm not saying this is the same for you, however, though it is a common problem related to this lifestyle.

Anyway, what are your interests? Do you have a passion for sports? Art? Music? Acting? Perhaps you could join a club or organization. If you like sports, join an adult league for one you played as a child, or start a totally new sport (I would highly suggest rowing!). If you like to act, join a local theatre company.

In doing this, you'll give yourself a specific time each week to devote to something you love. Plus, once you immerse yourself within a group of people with compatible interests, it's only natural that you'll start forming connections that extend beyond the scheduled time.

I hope you gain the friendships you're after!

thank you. I didn't think of that before. I am a singer and I also have been wanting to get back into a ballet class. This was great advice. I will try it.

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Aucunu

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June 21, 2008

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