I'm a happily married Wife of 18 years with 5 beautiful children. I have created with my Husband a Family life I never thought possible in this world of turmoil and confusion. Growing up through my teen years was more like an excersize in surviving, both emotionally and mentally. The first years of my adulthood I spent re-evaluating all that I had lived through, and then rebuilding myself into a person I liked and wanted to be. The realization that changed my life forever was when I came to understand; I was not who or what others said I was, or wanted me to be. I didn't have to repeat my parents mistakes, when there was so many of my own I could make. I realized I alone was responsible for my choices, and for letting others treat me badly. I was no longer a child, and could demand and expect to be treated well. By freezing out those who didn't understand that for me things had changed!! I was still young, so I didn't alway's know what to do, but I sure knew what NOT to do! Which that alone is sometimes half the battle!!
Gender: Female
Location: CA
Occupation: Domestic Engineer
Age: 39
Member Since: September 22, 2005
Answers: 31
Last Update: June 8, 2008
Visitors: 6393
Main Categories:
Love Life
Work/School Relationships
Families
View All
|
| |
|
ive been going out with this amazing girl for 4 days but the problem is i dont think she knows i love her /i dont think she loves me,can sum1 tell me a way to tell her i love her,by the way im 12 years old and we hav kissed twice like just a little pek though. (link)
|
First of all, unlike the others on here who have replied, I think its perfectly fine for you to have questions concerning your emotions. Regardless of your age I'm Happy to share my advice with you. You can go to my column and ask whatever you need to anytime and I'll tell you what I think. O.K.?
So now that we have that out of the way, let's talk about this girl. Apparently, the first Love of your life right?? Well at least I know that's how it feels to you right now. What your actually feeling right now is brought on by what we call chemistry. And yes, it just might be the beginings of what Love is made of. The truth is, even as intense as your feelings are for her, there is sooooo much more to the dynamics of True Love.
Love doesn't just happen. Love is something that is built and tested over time. Thats why people are telling you it can't be Love, because Love takes time to develop. It builds stronger day by day, and week by week, year by year.
However, what your feeling is real too, it's just not as intense. It's called infatuation and it's some powerful stuff. In fact it's easy to mistake it, because truthfully every Romantic Love does start with infatuation. But as time goes on, the infatuation wears off and the attraction either kinda dies off or starts becoming more of a deep caring, that over time can become Love. However you have to realize at your age the chances of this being one of those longtime lasting Loves is not really in your favor. Not that it hasn't happened but very few people are lucky enough to find their life-mate at 12 years old.
With that said, it doesn't take away the fact your feelings are genuine and strong. In fact they are probably some of the strongest feelings you have ever felt for a girl. Believe it or not though Real Love is 10 times or more stronger and intense.
With all that in mind I know you still want to find a way to express how much you really like her. However you did say you don't think she feels as strongly, so you have to be careful. You dont want to freak her out or anything. Which brings me directly to your friends advice. He is wrong!!! You should not do that!! Especially at school because then she may have friends who start teasing her or something and that could ruin everything. Besides a kiss is something you shouldn't plan. It should only happen when it feels right, not when you planned for it. That would make it awkward. If you are going to show her any type of affection maybe you could reach out and hold her hand as your standing next to her. Something simple and sweet like that. Just be yourself. Clearly she must have saw something she liked because she's been going out with you for 4 days. Don't mess it up by pushing your rush of emotions on her and scaring her off. There's nothing wrong with giving her gifts just because you were thinking of her. If nothing else you can give her flowers. Stick with the small stuff and let time create it's magic. One thing I want you to remember is if this doesn't last then at least now you have a small taste of how good Love makes a person feel. Someday when true Love finds you, you will see I am right about the difference. For now enjoy the moment, infatuation is nothing to pass up on. Take CAre, Be Yourself, and just relax. Good Luck. Oh and don't take advice from that friend. lol
|
|
Rating: 5
| |
ok thanks very much by the way do u hav msn so i can like discuss it with you cause like you said i dont want to embarras or scare her or sumthing thanks alot for the advice though
|
|