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Here's the story. From 4th grade all the way up to 8th I had a crush on the same guy. Simon, I'm not even gonna lie about his name. We had this kind of hate-love relationship. Basically, we pretended to hate eachother, he would "bully" me (i would enjoy it) he'd make fun of me, and I'd make fun of myself, and it was all good cause it gave us a reason to talk to eachother which we enjoyed. In 9th grade, for no real reason, we stopped talking. It got awkward, we'd just avoid eachother, and pretend we'd never met.
I couldn't get over it. Get over HIM, to be exact.
But it was okay, cause in a year we'd both be going to highschool and never had to see eachother again, I'd HAVE to get over him.
To my surprise, first day of school.. first thing I see is him. GREAT. great great great. This sucked, and it has for two years (yes, I'm almost a senior now, and I'm still talking about the same guy I did in 4th grade!) For the whole first year, it killed me to see him. I'd skip lunch and ceratin classes to avoid him, just cause I thought it was awkward, plus I didn't want to run into him sense I usually dont look that great at school. I would kinda "facebook stalk" him, if you know what I mean. But then this year, I decided to get over him, completely. So I blocked him, deleted him, FORCED myself to stop thinking about him. And it worked, it got less awkward, and thank the lord all mighty I got over him!
Yesterday, I saw him holding hands with one of the girls from my old school. I used to be popular in my old school, she used to be a loner. The tables have turned. And now she has the guy I want(ed) too!
It's hard to explain what happened when I saw him, but I kind of stopped breathing, and started crying, and fainted. I had to make up this silly excuse to everyone that I was having an allergic reaction.
I mean I knew they liked eachother, it had accured to me, and I knew they were probably gonna start dating, but still it was so hard for me to see that. I really had no right to react that way, we both hate eachother now, and we never even got close to dating (he didnt like me like that) so it was stupid that it affected me. Especially, since I have a new crush that likes me back and it's going good.
Now I just can't wait to graduate, get away from this guy.
But are there any tips on making it easier until then (there's more than a year left!)? Something I should say to him maybe?
[dont want to confess my feelings, since they're in the past - i AM over him. Don't want to tell him i regret losing him as a friend - but any other suggestions would be great, cause I feel so weak around him. Both physically AND mentally]
Thank you if you actually read all that!
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You say you're over him and thats really good. And i know its a shock when someone you liked for so long goes out with some one else you know. However I think the best thing to do now is act normal around him. Dont avoid, dont feel bad just act normal, you don't even have to talk to him. Just allowing yourself to be around him without feeling anything for him will help you move on completely! If you have to talk to him just to get over it being awkward i suggest talking about something that has to do with school work..
Also stay with friends or people your comfortable with it will help if he is around.
Good luck with your new crush, i'm glad you found some one else because holding onto the past will never help us move forward.
Hope it works out! And remember be normal around him! He doesn't expect anything!
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