You need advice???ASK ME!!!!I am Emily and i love helping others...I want to see happy people around me and people who smile!That's why i try to help you!It is said that i give good advice,what do you think????
Now, i would like to tell you something!Live!Every moment in our life is important, so have fun!And something about me..I love Erreway!!!!
Gender: Female
Age: 16
MSN: emily-smile@hotmail.com
Member Since: April 11, 2006
Answers: 57
Last Update: August 27, 2006
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I’ve been having issues with my parents lately. I have a different problem for each of them. I guess this is a two-part question.
In order to fully understand my situation, I think a little background information is required . . .
My parents met one another while they were in highschool. They started dating soon after and eventually my mother ended up pregnant with me at the age of seventeen. It was completely unexpected and unplanned - I was a ‘surprise’, if you will. At the time, my grandmother was a very traditional woman. The idea of premarital children just didn’t sit well with her. She managed to convince my parents that marriage was their only option. They married three months after I was born.
Because my father came from a wealthier family, he graduated from highschool and was able to attend university. My mother, on the other hand, dropped out of highschool four months before her graduation so she could get a full-time job in order to support me and father while he was in school.
It’s not really a surprise that my parents are divorced now, they have been since I was five. But that’s not the issue. I live with my mother and stepfather now and she often talks about how she wishes she hadn’t been so careless when she was younger. She’s always warning me not to ‘throw away’ my youth like she did.
I know she doesn’t mean it, but sometimes I feel as though she resents me. I can’t help but think about how much better her life could have been had she not had me at such a young age. I know this is all in the past, and what’s happened cannot be changed but I would just like to know how I can get past this feeling of “I ruined my mother’s life”. I'd like to be able to stop feeling like a mistake.
Any and all advice is welcome =]
And that’s just my mother. . .
Now for part two - my father.
Like I mentioned before, my parents got married and then divorced at a fairly young age. I live with my mother so I only see my father once a month, if that. I wouldn’t exactly say we’re close . . .
Anyways, a few days ago, my mother told me a story about my father that really disturbed me. She told me that three days before their wedding, at his bachelor party, my dad had cheated on her. And even though she knew about it, she still married him. I was completely shocked when I heard this. I can’t help but be angry at my father. He doesn’t know that I know about this yet, but I would really like to confront him about it. I’ve talked to my mom about it and she doesn’t want me to say anything to him. She suggested that I just let it go. However I know that I won’t be able to do that. To me, this isn’t something I can just forget about. I would like some sort explanation from my father, even though I know he wont have one for me.
I’m supposed to have dinner at his house Monday night and I plan on confronting him then. My only problem is that I don’t know how I should go about this.
Any suggestions or any advice whatsoever would be greatly appreciated =]
Sorry this is so long =/ (link)
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Honey, you are not a mistake..This is sure.Your mother loves you and i think that this is why you are with her now and not with your father...I think that both mum and dad love you.You are their child..They created you, you were "created" when they used to love each other...Talk with your mother and explain her how you feel.Explain her that you would like her to feel that she can have her own life.And tell her that she can do whatever she wants to feel good.Tell her that you understand how difficult her life has been but you couldn't stop it.You didn't even exist then.
Now, about your father, this would be a huge mistake to tell him about what he did when others will be there.When you will have dinner be normal, like always...And when you 2 will be alone talk to him...Tell him that you know it and that you did not like what he did.
But before doing something understand that he was young.It was a party we do before marriage and it is used something like that to happen.Don't judge him before trying to understand him.He was a young man who would pass his whole life with a woman.The same woman.He didn't know that he would take a divorce...Everything was so quick for him..His life would change...Immediatly...This is especially for men awful...Right?Sweety, understand him..
And n my opinion your mother should not tell you what happened.This has happened before a lot of years...Why did she tell you that?Is it sure that she did not want to make you hate your own father?I am sorry telling something like that but this is my opinion, what my instinct tells me...
I really hope i helped you..Really...Kisses and if you want to ask me sth else,send me e-mail there:emily-smile@hotmail.com
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Rating: 5
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Thanks so much for your advice =]
I feel much better.
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