Jealously is a sign of insecurity, always remember that. Your sister feels that YOU are so much more successful than she is, simply because you are happier and more well-loved. There is more than one kind of success, and (IMO) you seem to have taken the happier route- good for you!

Your sister shows the following behaviours:

1) Defensiveness when you call her. “Why is someone as successful as YOU calling someone like Me?”
2) Backbiting to cut you down (Correcting your grammar, reminding you that she has a higher education.)
3) Being pissy when she’s not invited to be in the bridal party.

I’m not sure that an outright, “what the heck is the matter with you?” confrontation right off the bat is the way to go, since at this point your sister can simply tell you to get lost, and then always feel that she is the better one, since YOU “attacked” her. If she is insecure about her weight/social/life, then the best thing to do is to ask her if anything is wrong and check her answers. If she continues to act this way, however, I recommend that you sit her down face-to-face, and ask her what is gong on.

If she is defensive (“why do you want to know?”) then you have a much larger problem on your hands. In order to have a relationship with her, you will need to help her bring her security levels up enough that she realizes that she is acting childish. Ask her how her day went. Ask her what she’s done recently. And yes, you might have to praise her a little (“you know, I’ve always admired how you had the strength to go through university”) to show that yes, she is doing SOMETHING right and worthwhile with herself, and that yes, being fat doesn’t always mean that you can never go anywhere or never be successful.

You might also have to realize, if she doesn’t start to change her behaviours, that sometimes blood isn’t always thicker than water. Unfortunately, if she is causing you severe mental distress, then you need to say goodbye to that relationship. An unhealthy relationship is not good for any of the participants.

Also, you didn't mention this, but ask yourself if your parents praise one of you over the other. Realistically, this happens, and if it does, then you need to ask them to stop interfering with your relationships. Even after they're gone, you will still need to deal with your sister, and having them praise, say, YOU when they talk to her only makes her feel more insecure and jealous of you.

yours was the best advice I got. Do you have a degree in psychology? You're smart!

I like reading, writing, and the outdoors. My favourite thing in the world is to work in my garden. An owner of a cat and a dog, I am an avid rock collector, bookworm, LOTR freak, and mouse-catcher. All questions are welcome and will receive long answers.

Be blessed!

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