I really think my life is worthless. I'm nothing special and i feel like such a waste. The only person who i can talk to, who keeps me going, who i have spent 3 years of my life being dedicated to, and loving .. could care less about me. I

f i can't have him i don't want any body else. I feel no point in living. I truely love him and he's the only reason i get up in the morning. I feel like just ending my life now, but i could no way do it, and i would never. This sounds immature and child-ish. But it's not. My feelings will never change.

What can i do to make everything better?

First of all, you said you knew it sounded immature and childish and that your feelings will never change. And yet you ask what you can do to make it better? If nothing will ever change, why are you asking us how to make it better? So you either need to believe things will get better or else don't bother asking us.

Just thought you should realize this.

You know what else? It IS immature and it IS childish. You want to DIE when so many people are DYING at this VERY second. People that deserve to live.

Although you might think of it as the other way around, I think people that want to die are selfish. Think of all of the wonderful people that have died. YOU have a chance to become a wonderful person and make a difference, or heck, even just be a bad person. And yet, there are still people who want to die. If you aren't going to live for yourself, at least live for those that can't live anymore. And what about the people that care about you? Oh please, don't say no one cares about you. There are people you don't even know that care about you. Even strangers would care about you. If you were going to kill yourself in the street, someone would try and save you. If you passed out on the sidewalk, someone would try and help you while someone else called an ambulance. And that's CARING about you.

Suicidal people. If they only waited a little longer, they would have lived. Most people that try to kill themselves and end up being saved from it regret what they have done and realize it was not the right thing to do. Of course when you're feeling like crap you want to kill yourself right at that very moment. But what about the future? What if you waited 10 years? What if you just wanted 10 minutes?

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

Why should you fear death? It's frightening that it can happen anywhere, anytime, any person. Death doesn't care who you are. Unlike most things, death isn't picky and discriminating. And when death visits someone, it's usually someone you thought would live forever.

Even if you lived a happy life up to 100 years old...what happens then? You die. You either die and leave behind what you had grieving for you. Or you live and grieve for what has already left you. So either way...death has a grip on you and you'll have to face it eventually in your life. It's a scary thing. It's something you can't escape.

These are the things that comfort me even though death is such a powerful and scary thing:
- You can make a difference in the world no matter how little or how big. Or how long you've been on this earth.
- You can at least live for those that haven't been able to.
- Everyone faces death anyway, so you are never alone.
- No matter who you are, you have a chance to make people happy. Making people happy, laugh, smile, feel warm hearted...it's a wonderful thing.
- No matter how old you are, you have accomplished many things. They can be big or small. Some things you may not even realize.

Yes death is scary. I want you to fear it. I want you to fear it enough so you will never want to die when your time is still plenty. But I don't want you to fear death so much you can't handle it when the time really comes. Everyone has a time when they will die. And your time will come when it comes. You can't WISH for it to come, especially when you still have much to go for. The time comes when it comes. So make the most of what you have until it comes.

Sorry for rambling on about death, but those were my thoughts about death and about selfish people. I was once like you. No, I didn't mope over a boy. I just felt like life had no point. But after thinking it over, I realized how selfish I was being and now I'm loving life.

You don't need a man to make you happy. The truth is, some people find true love and some people don't. What YOU need to do to make yourself feel better is to believe life CAN be worth something. Surround yourself with good friends. Do community service. Do all the things you've ever wanted to. By moping around and wishing yourself to die, you're only going to make it worse. Your may always remember the pain one boy caused you, but over time you will realize that pain was childish and stupid. You probably think I'm crazy and I know nothing, and that's fine, but I know you will understand someday when you get your head out of the dumps.

Dating is all about bonding with someone, gaining new experiences, and finding out what you need and want. You did exactly that, didn't you? So why mope around? You've done exactly what you're supposed to do when you date. If things don't work out you move on and live life. Now the only thing left to do is for you to do THAT...move on and live life.

Sorry if I sounded harsh, but you need a reality check. Life is what you make it. So make it great.