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I'm Em.

I'm a 20 year old English/History student living in Sydney.

I dig art, music and books.

I'll take questions on relationships, friendships, high school, uni, or whatever else.

I try to give the best advice I can, usually drawing on my own personal experience. But I'm not perfect, and sometimes when I look back on some of my advice it's far from it (especially when I was 15 and writing LiKe THiS). It's just advice, though. It's not an answer or a solution, it's simply a potentially helpful perspective. And that's all I can offer you.


Yayoi Kusama

"Infinity Mirror Room"

Performance art.

Mirrors, soft sculptures.

Castellane Gallery, New York.


Gender: Female
Location: Sydney, Australia.
Member Since: January 11, 2007
Answers: 391
Last Update: May 22, 2014
Visitors: 13046

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this mostly goes out to the guys..

do they notice underwear lines? is it a turnoff if there underwere is accidentally sticking out
or do you prefer g-strings and such? (link)
Um well im not a guy but it looks kind of trashy when girls have their underwear and g strings showing. i know some guys who get excited lol when they see chicks bend over and they see their g string but constantly wearing it out just looks kind of slutty and gross. Just puttin my opinion out there but do whatever you want love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

what kind of blonde hairdye product do people usually use? you know how like girls with scene hair has that blonde hair extention?
i just want to know what the product is that they use for blonde? thankks (link)
Hmm you might have to be a bit more specific. Do you want to dye your hair blonde? If so what colour is your hair and how dark/light is it. theres usually a range of different blonde products for hair. I streaked my hair blonde with a schwarzkopf streaker and it worked pretty well for my brown hair. If you want your hair entirly blonde you could bleach it? but it will dry your hair out alot and if you use it to much over a long period of time Your hair can fall out. Your question kind of confused me lol but if you want to blonde your hair you could choose the right blonde for you at a hairdresser or look in your chemist at the different kinds of blondes and chose the best for your hair colour.

becuase i overplucked my eyebrows. i let them grow in, and its almost like its growing off my head, in a different directing, not along it.

how can i help it? (link)
Dont try and fix this yourself cuz you could end up with wonky eyebrows or no eyebrows at all. Get them waxed by a good beautition. Alot of beautitions style your eyebrows and should be able to help out. Loev xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

what are some really awesome kinda unknown bands that are like panic at the disco, mcr, the red jumpsuits,fall out boy, stuff in that catagory. also some other unique bands like the dresdon dolls (i doubt anyone really knows them though,there from MA) or any underground band. or also some more popular bands that are like that? i really like the music,its interesting. thanks (link)
Personally i love muse, they have some new stuff out now but i love some of their older songs like hysteria, time is running out, shock syndrome, just to name afew, Rufio [[LOVE their song in my eyes]] ,stonesour [[Best i would say their song "through the glass"]] And you might like wolf mother [[SOme songs i like of theirs are minds eye, joker and the theif]] its only afew bands but u should check them out! Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

Around last Thursday i was acting really stupid on msn and now this guy thinks i like him, now everyone does when i dont. It's kind of like "big" and i don't know im almost depressed because i don't. (link)
Stress less! i LOOK at any guy and my friends assume i like him. Sooner or later it'll all blow over and everyone will forget about it. Just smile and dont worry about what other people think so much. As long as you know you dont thats all that matters. Hope you feel better =] Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

Do llbeans Rugby Stripe Boat and Tote Bag's have pockets inside?

thanks! (link)
ive seen those bags before and i dont think that they do, but im not 100% sure. Im pretty sure they dont.

okay well i think my house is very boring i mean its big an stuff an everyone says its awesome but there is nothing to do
any advice on that?
and at nigh ttime im tired of doing nothing but get on lap top and watch tv what else could i do?
i mean like real fun stuff nothing like just dancing an listening to music i mean i can do that on computer
so yeah please help becaus eim tired of always being bored (link)
Hellooo i suggest taking up a sport. if your house is boring then go outside! Call some friends over and watch movies or try and spend as much time as u can outside your house. Going for a walk, walking the dog, anything to entertain yourself for a while. You could also take up a hobby like personally im into fashion designing and drawing But you could try cooking or reading or anything. Hope i helped =] Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

Okay, this is long so be prepared. Let's call this guy Fred. He's in 11th grade and I'm in 9th. Obviously, I really like him. Heh so we met like at the second month of this school year? I really don't know how because I didn't know him and vice versa...but like one day out of random he hugged me at lunch saying "She's a cutie." to a friend that we both know. And after that, I was walking to lunch with my bff and the friend that we both know and Fred were like "Come stand in line with us." and I was like why? And his friend and Fred were like "Because you're pretty/beautiful." And my bff was like "He likkeeess you." btw, my bff is a guy that's gay. Anywhos, then after that he puts his arms around me [not possessivly but rather like cute-ly?] haha. Twice he almost got in trouble for it. Also, during one of the [strings] concerts, he was backstage waving at me frantically =P He also calls me a nickname he made me, cute, pretty, and beautiful a lot. He also gives me bear hugs and always gets up to stand with me when I go over to his lunch table. Last time he was like "You're tall for a girl." and I was like "Hmmm, I'm still shorter than most people." and he goes "I'm still short" [yet, he's still taller than me XD] I go "You're not short. You're taller than me." and then he goes "Well, I like tall girls. Do you like tall guys?" and I was like "Why not?" Haha anyways, do you think he likes me, or what? Tell me the truth. I won't give you 1's because I didn't want to hear the answer. (link)
Lol ok obviously the guy likes you. if you like him back then you might as well tell him. you 2 sound like a pretty cute couple to so do it! lol ok Hope it all works out =] Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

13f ok so theres this guys at school that i kinda like and one day in my choir class one of his friends asked me if i would go out with his friend (the guy i like) and i said no cause i thought he might be joking and i didnt want to make a fool out of myself so neither of them were laughing and the guy i like seemed kinda nervous cause he was sitting right behind me when his friends asked me and after i said no he seemed upset so i very confused right now i dont know if he actualy likes me or if it was just a joke i mean i cant really see why he would like me cause i'm fat and ugly but whatever please help i'm so confused and i really like this guy (link)
Everyones beautiful in their own unique way so dont call yourself fat and ugly. This guy obviously likes you and if you like him maybe you should ask him if his friends were joking wen they asked you out for him. Do this as soon as possible! if you realli like this guy maybe you should explain that you thought they were joking and that you actually like him to. i hope it all works out =] Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

hey ok, so when my boyfriend and i have sex.. he never finishes... he usually makes an excuse for us to stop. what's up with that? i know that im good.. he tells me i am. also when we are talking about sexual stuff he kinda avoids it, like he doesnt like to talk bout it? he usually jokes around about stuff like that on the phone.. like forplay kind of stuff and sexual things, but when we are in person he like never brings it up. is there anything that i can do to get him more comfortable about talking that way? because that would really turn me on & might make the sex better. (link)
if hes never had sex with anyone before he could just be nervous about what he should do when your finished. Try to get him to open up to you. Talk to him about it and see whats wrong or upsetting him. Hope i helped =] Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

My boyfriend of almost two years dumped me a week ago. We haven’t spoken since. I was sort of expecting it so all he said was “I can’t do this anymore. I’ve had one foot out the door for months.” I didn’t want to cry in front of him or get angry, so I just told him he could leave, and he pretty much ran out.

Now, I know I want him back. I know I miss him. I feel like most of our problems existed entirely in his head, but I do accept that it is over and there is no way we are getting back together. I’m a little confused though. I wish I’d listened to more of his explanation so I knew just what he was thinking (and that he doesn’t hate me, have no respect for me or think I’m a total idiot... all those nice things you are supposed to reassure someone of when you dump them.)

Should I e-mail him and ask for his reasons? Just to put my mind at ease. I’m not sure he could actually say anything that would make it easier... Or should I just let it go and keep on not speaking to him at all? (link)
2 years is a long time to be with someone and suddenly not having them in your life is a huge change. Usually when im going through a breakup i take some time to cry it all out, eat alot of icecream and watch sad movies, then i have a sleepover with my friends and go shopping. It might take some time to get over him but being single isnt the end of the world. Think of positives like you can flirt with whoever you want! Or you could end up finding someone fantastic and even better than your ex. Even if happiness doesnt find you straight away dont give up =] Just keep thinking positives and you'll start to feel better. Asking for reasons isnt really going to help now and you'll just think of ways you would have solved your problems and you'll just think its your fault even though its not. Move on and live you life and have fun!! Hope you feel better soon =] Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx


She is just rawr. Like, she likes this boy, that likes me.. & I used to like him [it has nothing to do with me still having feelings for him] But, she always likes the same people I do, she just always copies me! & the people she likes, don't like her.. at all. & i just can't stand it. How do I make her understand these things? Why does she want to waste her time?

& then when i try to be like.. "why do you like him? he doesn't like you.. like someone who likes you." [i say it alot nicer though] & she flips out. she starts saying.. "What are you trying to get at" & stuff & its like grr annoying.

what do i do? (link)
Ok shes kind of like a little sibling who wants to be just like you. She obviously looks up to you alot and probably thinks that if she acts like you, more people will like her. Kind of flattering. But i can see its getting on your nerves. Dont tell her that she should like someone else because this person doesnt like her because its just breaking down her self esteem. I know sometimes you just want to tell her things but think how you would feel if someone you looked up to or cared about said that to you. Its easy to say things like that when your angry but it seems like its really hurting her. Everyone has a chance with anyone so dont tell her that they wont like her. Try and give her some confidence. Maybe you could try finding a guy that does like her and say you like him so that she would like him. Or you could try and set her up with someone. She might actually like the guy she says she likes right now, You never know. If its getting you angry dont yell at her cuz it will just make her feel worse. Try to sit down and talk to her if its annoying you but dont yell. Dont tell her she cant get someone instead say she can have any guy she wants but that currently the person she likes isnt interested in her right now. I hope everything works out for you =] Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

okay me and my boyfriend are getting pretty intamite but i dont know. im not really comfortable with my body like not too skinny or fat but like my boobs and down there. like idk to me i think that it looks gross and like i dont want to get intamite with him and be like gross. i shave down there and i have b sized boobs but like idk do guys find it gross or no cus i know i find there stuff gross haha. (link)
Well i think you need more confidence in your body. Dont worry about if he thinks its "gross" or not because he'll probably think your beautiful. If its really worrying you and you dont want to show him yourself because your afraid of what he might think, try to talk to him about it. If thats too hard, get intimate in the dark! lol but seriously i dont think that he will find you gross at all so dont worry. The human body is a beautiful thing as my mum always says >.> Anyways you should love your body! no matter how it looks. Hope i helped =] Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

I broke up with my ex several months ago. It was a long distance relationship on the rocks. My ex was being a complete jerk as usual and sort of forced me to end things. Anyways, in the last couple of months I've been working on my self esteem and I'm even going back to college to work in rehabilitation, something I never would have done had I still been with him. Recently one of my ex's friends came into the store I work in and was asking me questions like how the job was going. I told him my plans of going back to school to work in health care and he got this really shocked, sort of worried look on his face. Do you think my ex was getting him to ask me these questions? And why do you think he looked so worried? (link)
I think your ex still likes you and got his friend to ask you questions. He probably has a worried look on his face because your moving on with your life and will probably end up finding someone else. Im not sure if thats it but its what i think. Hope i helped =] Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

okay, this is going to be kind of long since you need background information. my "first love" and i had been "talking" for 2 years but were never an official couple. he took my virginity and we've been through alot, we would never fully commit to a relationship and never spent any "quality time" with me, like we would hangout but we would never really go anywhere. but i ended up falling in love with him, but he was involved in selling drugs, and didnt want a girlfriend while he was living that life. so i would try to move on and talk to other guys and we would go months on end without talking then he would find out and try to become part of my life again only to leave once he was sure he still had me. well this started in 04 and continued on till now basically again we hadnt been talking for a while and i was determined to move on and i met this boy max. max is involved in selling drugs so i cant say hes better in that way, but he's affectionate with him in front of his friends, funny my friends and family all love him, and hes a total sweetheart. everytime i even hear his name i smile. now my "first" called me around newyears and got sent away to tennesse he came over to say goodbye and FINNALY said i love you back and i gave him my chain. he calls me everynight now, and really wants to get on track tell me he loves me, and hes finnaly opening up and hes been immature. blaise blaise. you get the point. well were together officially now. and why i thought this is what i always wanted i cant help but think about max. me and my mom got into an argument over my first the otherday and for the first time she hit me, i ran away and i ended up going to max and he stayed with me and was helping me out. i then called my first and told him what happened he made me return home. max then got kinda quiet, but later that night i txt him thank you and sorry and everything and he was just like dont worry about it i like you alot. and i like him alot too but i couldnt say that. all my homegirls think it should be obvious and im dumb for even thinking about max. i mean i waited two years for my first. but i was starting to move on and max just sort of had that impact on me, i dont know maybe its my fear of commitment but i think i really do care. but my first is opening up and i do still love him, but i think he waited two long. im at complete lost. at what i should do. i dont want to put my first down when hes already down but at the same time. i care for both of them. HELP! (link)
Ok your "first" loves you but once he feels that your growing apart he starts to feel insecure and tries to get you back then when he knows he has you again, he returns to his distant self. He doesnt sound like a very good boyfriend. I mean i dont know the guy to say if he is or not but it sounds like he just needs someone with him. Max seems to be inlove with you and wants to be with you. I know you waited a long time for your "first" but he didnt realise what he had infront of him the whole time. I think its unfair to max for you to just go to your "first" when hes hardly been there for you. Max seems like a good choice for a boyfriend who will always be there for you and love you. Dont choose Max just because i think you should if you love your "first" more then stick with him. I hope everything works out alright =] Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

okay so this might be very long and im sorry but i need some other peoples opinions on this.

so i used to live with my grandmother. for 13yrs then i moved in with my mom and dad only a few months ago and my school work was getting better but now i feel in the same situation as i dont feel like getting up to go or just cant be bothered trying anymore. my mom is ALWAYS at work and when she does finally come home she sits and does MORE work. its not that she has to because he job only requires her to work untill 6pm. my dad isnt working and hes hard to talk to everything is a joke to him and if you have an issue you can deal with it yourself cause its all in your head supposedly which yeah on some things i can agree but a lot of times i just wanna talk. im not allowed to go places therefore i dont have many friends I DO though have a long distance relationship and he makes me extreemly happy whenn ever i talk to him which is usually for the most part of the day after school till some1 has to eat dinner then on the phone again till bedtime or whenever we fall asleep on the phone. he has helped me with so many problems and i help him when hes down too but its not all helping we have an awesome time laughing and making jokes and just stupid stuff that no1 else would think is funny but were weird together so its good for us. :) yea so mostly im in my room from when i get home from school till when its time to go back (except for bathroom and to eat dinner and stuff) and im always sitting by myself and eating dinner and my mom is at work of course and my dad well if he eats in the same room as me,im just not used to talking to him so its weird and he doesnt make any effort to start a convo. i used to try to wait for my mom to get home for dinner but by that time i would have to be almost ready to get myself to bed in order to even try to wake up and go to school. my boyfriend (long dist thing.) of almost seven months now came so visit me with his mom and his grandmom and his brother and his mom and grandmom treated me like so nice! and they gave me a hug and stuff and i almost wanted to cry cause i never get that and his mom loves me and stuff and thats hard to get his mom to approve of any girl for her sons :) anyways i have a therapist and i was talking to her about all this and she thinks it would be good that maybe on school breaks i could get away from everything and go see him and his family and stuff which i would love because sometimes thats all i want is to just get away. ya know and be happy, but my mom wont even let me to the mall with friends cause shes "overprotective" and i dont see why because shes never there. and alex (my bf) and i were talking about all this and he thinks id be wayy better off if i was there with him and his family hes 16 and im 14 btw. but i know my momwould never let me because she thinks ill im gonna do or want is sex or something but im not i just want to be happy i hate feeling alone all the time it sucks. so like does anyone else think it would be a good idea or do you think im being selfish or anything because i dont want to be like that. also i think if i was able to move there i'd be eating better for one thing and my school work would improve tons cause id have some1 there to motivate me and everything and plus his mom is way nice to me and shes fine if i ever wanted to or could do that. but i just dont know. so if anyone knows anyway that i could make it possible cause arent i being sort of neglected? if my theapist person knew all this stuff wouldnt she like be able to let me go there or something?!? ahh im just, i dont know. i need help.


thanks a lot if you ever get to the end of reading that sorry it was so long. (link)
You defintley deserve more attention from your parents but obviously thats not working out for you. Maybe you should sit down with your mum and explain this to her. Tell her you would be happy living with your boyfriend and it would improve your work and make sure you expain that you just want to be near someone who loves you and gives you attention. Im glad you have someone in your life that makes you happy seeing as your family doesnt realli help. My friends mum never lets her out as well and she hates it but her overprotective-ness is just because she cares about you alot and doesn't want anything to happen to you. If your mum has a day off work try to spend sometime with her, like go shopping. If your mum won't let you stay at your boyfriends you could try and negotiate if you could spend weekend there or something. If that still doesn't work, dont do something like run away. In a couple of years you'll be old enough to move out on your own. Sorry if i couldnt help you but i hope everything works out ok for you =] Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

no it was the day after a had sex and it was my real period but is there sitll that chance i might be (link)
Hmm Well there have been women who have had their period and were pregnant. I wouldnt worry to much unless your experiencing morning sickness. If your still worried you might be then just get a pregnancy test. You can ask your local chemist for one.

she is just the one girl who takes all the guys i like. before i have a chance with them.I really like this one guy lets call him bob she is now going out with him and now she bumps into me on purpose and is always rude to me.i cant compete with her. it not fair.she has a c or d cup and is always flirting and is a hoe and i am the smart, funny, laid back girl who is pretty but then she shows up. what do i do. i still really like this guy bob. how can i stop this from happening and why is she doing this to me (link)
Dont say you cant compete with her. You have the same chance with any guy that she has. If shes like you say she is, then guys only like her because of her looks and her boyfriend will eventually get bored of her. You seem like a really nice person with a great personality and thats why guys should like you so if "bob" likes this chick more than you hes probably not worth it. Try not to tell so many people about who you like. If you have to tell someone tell your closest or best friend or someone who you trust alot. i hope everything works out =] Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

ok so there is this girl im pretty good friends with and i like her alot but i dont know how to tell her. i dont talk to her too much in person, but i used to talk to her alot on the phone and i talk to her all the tiem on the computer. she leaves me little comments like "loser1 (link)
Lol Cute you definatley need to talk to her more in person. Ask her out to the movies or if she wants to do something during the weekend. You could do something romantic like take her out to dinner if you really like her or ask where SHE would like to go like shopping or something. You could even just drop by her house and go for a walk with her. This will give you quality time where you can tell her you like her and ask her out. Hope it all works out =] Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

I've been in love with this guy now (ever since 8th grade), I'm still in highschool. He's a teacher and I'm pretty sure he's into me. We touch and have our "moments". I promised his one of his family members that I wouldn't get him in trouble but lately we've been all over each other. He's so perfect in every way. What should I do? (link)
Ok well the main problem is that hes a teacher and you are a student. I know you probably know this but its illegal. He could loose his job if other teachers or the principal or your parents find out about your fling. Hes obviously older than you and as much as it hurts, you have to accept that you should stick to someone your own age. im sorry but i really think you should just forget about him. Maybe when your out of school you could hook up with him later but definatley not when your a student. Im sorry and i hope everything works out alright =] Love xXxPuNki-PiXiExXx

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