I aim to give you solid advice on your problems. I don't sugarcoat things and I'm always straight up. Don't come asking for what you want to hear as I always give the truth even if you don't want it because it's what you need and the only way to grow.
Member Since: December 31, 2006
Last Update: September 12, 2014
Doesn't Fit Any Of These Categories
I'm a 17 year old girl from Australia who planned on going on a schoolies trip with a few friends a while ago. I paid half of my share but afterwards decided to pull out because I was going to go overseas with my family instead. Because of my last minute decision, I was content with letting them keep the money.|
However, after a series of events, the family trip got cancelled. One of the friends (who I'll call Girl A) suggested that I go with them. So I asked the rest of the group, who were hesitant and frustrated with all my sudden change of attitudes and because they had already planned the rest of the trip (transportation, budget, things to bring etc.). I agreed to the list of things they set me to bring and even offered to get my own transportation (since there's no more room in the cars because of their luggage) which will cost me a lot of money.
I know it was wrong of me to mess up their plans but I did pay for it and most of them weren't willing to give me back my money at this point.
Because of all this, they're all now frustrated with me and I'm afraid that I'll be nothing but a burden the whole trip. Girl A is the only one who isn't upset with me and said that she'll stay by my side, but I don't want to hold her back from having fun with the rest of the group.
Now I'm trying to mend friendships with the rest of the group, but they're still reluctant to forgive me. I genuinely want to go especially since my best friend Girl A wants me come, but I'm afraid I'll be excluded from the rest of the group most of the time.
If I decide not to go then I thought that I'll try to negotiate with them to get my money back after the trip because money is a bit tight with them at the moment (which I think is why they didn't want to pay me back before).
Basically, I don't want to go if my 'so-called friends' don't even want me there. I have to make a final decision within the next 24 hours. Should I stay or should I go? Is it worth it? (link)
If you paid for this trip and they have your money already and are keeping it regardless of excuse than you need your parents involved. There should be none of this 24 BS.
Who cares if they don't want you there? I can understand them being miffed and having to change things but big deal. Go and enjoy yourself or have your parents approach theirs and go after your money.
If you truly want to see Australia you should speak up and make sure other adults put them in their place so there's no more BS and they don't try to ruin a good time that you paid for. They are 100% in the wrong regardless of circumstance to not refund your money and keep a hold of it and then try to do the trip and make you feel bad for going.
You did back out, they kept the money and yes you came back but as long as they have your cash you better go as I have a feeling unless adults are involved that you'll never see a cent of it again. Have your parents call their parents and raise hell over the cash. If you don't get it back in a timely fashion you could make a lawyer get it back as the funds aren't rightfully their own.
Tell your parents the situation and that they demand a flash 24hr decision and have all your money and I'm sure you'll see within 24 hours or less a reversal in their attitude as nobody has to put up with this. Don't deny yourself a vacation even if they are going too or take your money back and go alone or with someone worthy in the future. I think not going let's them win--it's a victory to them getting what they want. I'd go and afterwards have ZERO to do with them. They need to grow up and accept all of this was out of your control.
Thank you so much for your advice. It's really encouraged me to go and it's given me confidence to stick up to the rest of my "friends". I'm just going to have fun despite what they think. Thanks again! :D