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I have gone from younggrandma to just yg. Now,
I am using my real name.
I don't think anyone who knows me will have trouble figuring out who that is!


I have been gone a while dealing with things in my own life. I am back now to help once again. Do not expect answers from me that just tell you what you want to hear. Life is to short for nonsense. :)
Website: advicenators forum
E-mail: krickel@gmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: KANSAS
Occupation: Homemaker,EMT, ER worker, Medical assistant
Member Since: March 4, 2005
Answers: 10020
Last Update: December 2, 2014
Visitors: 486483


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He likes to receive oral, and I do it for him every other day because I care about him and want him to feel good. He knows that I love it, but only does it for me 1-2 times every two weeks. He says he doesn't mind it and that it has nothing to do with my hygiene which is immaculate. He always has an excuse, like that he is tired or he is just not in the mood. Yet, he is always up for him getting it or having sex. I feel like there is something he isn't telling me, but whenever I bring it up, he gets angry. What should I do? (link)
I like Solidadvice4teens advice. I do want to add
that it is possible that he just doesn't like doing it. Maybe he does it now and then just to make you happy, but really just doesn't enjoy doing it.

You do need to have a talk about it. Talk when you aren't upset. If he just doesn't like it then you have to decide if you can live with having it that way just now and then. Of course the same goes for him. You don't get it...He doesn't either.


well we sometimes play around and we play video games together and we hang out almost every sunday night. would that make a difference?? (link)
I think I would talk to him about it.
Maybe just tell him you would LOVE to go
should he still need a date. Tell him you saw his tweet. See how it goes.

You know sometimes a guy doesn't see a girl
right there under his own nose! Sees you as
one of the guys. Might just be time to show
him you are his friend AND a potential girlfriend.
Go for it. I would love to know how it turns out.


Okay so my guy friend that's a junior posted on Twitter that he is should most likely start finding a prom date because he was desperate. I am a sophomore and really close friends with him. Do you think there's anyway of being asked to his prom?
(link)
There's always a chance!

Most people will want to take someone that
they have romantic feeling for to the prom.
Its one of those "big date" events, as a rule.
Do you think he see's you as a possible girlfriend
of the romantic kind? Do you see him like that?

Either way, you could always jokingly say to
him that if he is really desperate you will go.
See how he takes that. You could also just ask
him straight up.

Just one word of caution. If he
likes being your friend, but doesn't really see
you as a serious girlfriend, talking about going with him might make things a little uncomfortable
in the future. So, be prepared for a turn down just in case & try to laugh it off should it happen.

Good luck!


18/f, been in a happy, secure relationship for over 2 years.

At first, giving oral was something I would do to my boyfriend to impress him and let him know that I can be sexy. after months (and years) went by, I stopped having the desire to show him that side of me through oral sex. I've come to despise it, actually. I hate the taste, I hate that it makes my mouth sore, and I just don't like the feeling it gives me - like I'm degrading myself.

My boyfriend for the most part respects this. On his birthday, I've (unfortunately) made it a tradition to give him head and let him finish right then and there. Since his birthday's coming up, he keeps talking about it and how excited he is. I couldn't be dreading it more.

thinking about it upsets me because all the other girls I know love to perform oral on their boyfriends. It makes me feel abnormal and that my boyfriend deserves someone who would enjoy it as much as he does. I hate feeling this way and I'm never at peace with myself for it.

so, I'm not weird right? (link)
First of all, if you don't like it then you don't have to do it. Sounds like the boyfriend is mostly good with that. If you don't want it to be considered a traditional part of his birthday gift that he is expecting, then you need to say so & be done with that. Not saying anything will just make you feel worse everyday until his birthday.

Just because others like it doesn't mean you have to. It doesn't make you weird at all. They aren't weird either. Some ladies consider it just another way of making love with their guy. Giving him something he enjoys. If you could think of it in that way it might help, IF it is something you want to enjoy. If not, then just let him know. He may be mentioning it just to get your reaction. Have a heart to heart talk with him & let him know you really just don't enjoy doing it.


Will 5-8 sleeping pills make u fall asleep straight away if u aren't trying to sleep (link)
Well they will probably kill you. Not really sleeping. You will probably fight for breath & vomit all over yourself.

Don't know why you'd take any at all if you didn't want to sleep.


I think you all suck major balls. I've been trying to find a painless way to kill myself for the past 2 hours. If someone wants to kill themselves then they probably have a very good reason for it so why don't you fuckers just give some fucking answers instead of the FAKE bullshit like "your too young to die" or "You have so much to live for" or "think about how your hurting your loved ones" in most cases what the hell makes you think we HAVE loved ones??? I'm so fucking sick of seeing those bullshit answers and i'm not even the person asking it on the fucking forms. If you can't answer the question then don't say anything at all! for me, as i'm sure it is for most, it is NOT for attention. It's to die PAINLESSLY. We don't give a fuck about how wonderful YOU think life is. The worst one i've seen yet is someone who has an illness and is in pain 24/7. no one could even help that poor soul end it. FUCK you all for not helping. FUCK YOU. go die. You are the reason for suicide. You are all stupid. I hate you. FUCK YOU ALL. You are NOT showing compassion you are being fucking HEARTLESS. (link)
Who said life was wonderful? Life sucks sometimes.
Nobody is guaranteed a wonderful flowery existence with no pain or problems.

Most people get a pair and muddle through as best they can. Sooner or later things work out and all becomes tolerable again.

Some people are chicken shits who off themselves because they don't have what it takes to get off their ass & change their lives.

You think you're sick of it?

People who bother to take the time to try to help
others deserve better than your rant. I have been here for years & I know I have helped people. But
let me tell you what. It isn't easy sometimes. People who actually care are torn apart by those who feel they need to end it all. Its hard trying to make someone understand that tomorrow is a new day & a year from now none of the problems they have now will even matter one bit. Its hard when you have absolutley no way to reach out & hug that person.

So, I am gonna say what I think for a change. FUCK YOU! You want to off yourself don't come on here asking how. We don't need the frustration.





This guy and I are stuck in this weird phase... Like, there's a weird feeling whenever we hang out that we're not friends, but we're not in a relationship either. It's mutual, you can tell, just one of those things you know the other can feel too. We met through work, and things got increeedibly flirty there. But he recently went on educational leave. We still see each other because we go to the same community college, we see each other A LOT. I'm a habitual person, and everyday after classes I like to sit in a common area and do my homework (I can't do it at home, too many distractions). A week after the first semester started he caught me in the common room, we both were surprised to see each other. Then he kept catching me everyday, and he soon realized this was my routine. So everyday after classes I'll sit somewhere, and when his classes are over he'll come and sit next to me. And it's for hoooouurs. On average it's like, 3 hours. The longest we've sat there together was for 6 hours. We talk about a large range of stuff, a lot of it is deep stuff from politics to our problems. And we recently had mid terms, so this has been going on for a while. But the weird thing is at the college is all we ever hang out at. We text every once in a while, but when it comes to anything else it gets weird. Like, I could NEVER ask him to a movie or something because he'd get all tease-y like "Ooo, is this a date?" and he can't suggest anything either 'cuz he feels I'd do the same. When other people come around he gets so flirty and tease-y with me and tries to bring me into the conversation. Like if a friend of his stops by and talks about a crappy math test, he'll be like "You sound like Cynthia," (me), "she's terrible at math!" or "Oh yeah, this one here thinks that teacher is annoying." and he acts more daring and silly. Like I was showing my friend a Youtube video on my laptop, and walked over and leaned his head down in front of the screen blocking it with his head to see. He would never do that when we were alone, though. I don't know things are so weird and confusing with him! I don't know what to do. This weird flirty phase has been happening for over 5 months now. I hate being in a world of unknown, I like things clear and out there! One or the other, friend or boyfriend. So what should I do, should I friend zone him, or confront him? Grrrr. (link)
If you think you'd like to date him then go for it.
Ask him how about we go watch this movie. I heard it was good. If he teases and asks if it is a date, say sure if you want it to be! Just see what he says.

It doesn't hurt to ask someone how they feel. So if nothing else, just ask him. Tell him you are getting some mixed signals. It sounds to me like he does like you a lot. He tries to include you in conversations with his friends. He wants to be included in your convos with your friends.

Give the dude a nudge! :)


I think I may have a ingrown toenail...
1. The edge of my big toe curves under itself and is buied somewhere in my skin.
2. When I walk for a long time I can feel it digging in
3. But it is perfectly healthy toenail

Should I be doing something? (link)
It sure sounds like you have an ingrown toenail.
Healthy or not its making trouble! Even if you could dig the edges out & get them trimmed, they usually grow back & cause trouble again.

What you should really do is make an appointment with your doctor. He/she will probably remove it for you. No more pain! They do get VERY painful if left untreated & could get infected over time. So, check with your doctor. If you have caught it soon enough they may be able to do something other than removal.


I moved away from my crush and he dropped hints that. He liked me and all of his friends would tease him that he liked me and I liked him back after some time and he was so sweet to me . He knew I was moving away and helped me take my stuff out of my locker and said bye to me and signed my binder. I tryed so hard telling him that I liked him but I didn't get to because my friends where there the whole time and I didn't get an alone moment to tell him . And my friend said that he kind of likes her and my crush was friends with my friend . And my friend didnt know that i liked him back and I don't know what to do because I miss him and I don't know if it's true and I'm kind of sad that he forgot about me so quickly because I moved away like 1 month ago. He dosnt have a phone and i don't know if he has an email to talk to him so please help I don't know what to do . (link)
You don't say how far away from him you moved.
If it is a long distance then you may as well just move on & try to find someone else to crush on closer to where you are.

Young guys just don't stick with any one girl for long. You didn't really have a relationship so he probably didn't think a lot about it. Since you were moving, even if he did like you, a relationship under those circumstances probably isn't the greatest idea. To have a good romantic relationship, you need to be able to see each other & date & stuff.

There is no reason why you can't look him up on Facebook or something. Lots of times people include their email if they don't mind people writing to them. No reason you can't become friends. No telling what might happen in the future.


I hate myself and have wanted to die for many many years now, can anyone help me accomplish this? do NOT lecture me or try to scare me or talk me out of it. PLEASE I only want help, suggestions, know success, etc. so I can proceed now. The sooner the better, ive put this off for way too long. I have made attempts and have obviously failed. Please help me to finally successfully end my useless life. I am an organ donor and would prefer to help anyone I can with what I have, I do not need it. I only need 1 thing, and that is death, this life means nothing. I do not help anyone or anything, I am lost, lonely, confused, yet absolutely DONE. Being here could be hell. (link)
Life can really suck at times. I think everyone has probably gone through something at one time or another and thought it would just be easier to end it all.

Then you wake up one day and think, man, I'm glad I'm still here. First...If anyone were to give you advice on killing yourself, they would be gone from here so fast it would make your head spin. Just not gonna happen.

Second, How would anyone know what works well & what doesn't? Probably only those with medical knowledge. They won't tell you how because they just don't do things like that.

Third, do you really want to depend on the advice of some stranger on a subject such as this? Do you realize how many down right whack jobs we have to ban just because they give rotten advice?

Admittedly not as many as we used to, but still...there are idiots out there who get their jollies telling people the most harmful things. Some just because they don't know as much as they think they do. Others just because there are mean people in this world with nothing better to do.

Stop with the attempts. Instead of trying to off yourself, put that energy into fixing what ails you. Go see a doctor. I've known plenty of people who have wanted to end it all. A couple were successful. All they got for their actions was dead. They didn't FIX anything. All they did was make life hell for family and friends.

You can be far more useful to others by fixing yourself & then getting educated to help others fix themselves. Your organs won't be worth crap to anyone. By the time you are found they would be useless. Your methods would probably make them useless anyway.

So, no good useful advice for offing yourself here. I do hope to hear someday that you got off your butt and went out there and found help for yourself. You really are worth the effort ya know.


I'm 13 years old and i've had my period for a few years, I just used a tampon for the first time last night, I went to bed with it in, at about 2 pm the next day I tried to take it out and I was in tears the whole time, so I stopped and tried again in 30 minutes, I got it out, but it still felt like I was going to scream. It's about 10 pm and I haven't put one in. I'm not to fond of them, I can feel it, and it kind of hurts. I sit down and like, I know it's there. Please help.. (link)
Its OK to sleep with a tampon in, but you should never leave one in for longer than 8 hrs. When you do they can be painful to remove. There is also the risk of toxic shock syndrome if left in for a long time. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001676/

That being said, tampons are not for everyone. If they don't feel comfortable to you, just use a pad. Keep some tampons around if you want to swim in the summertime & just use a pad the rest of the time. Nothing at all wrong with doing that.


Hi, so I'm a gay male. I've been married for only half a year. My husband and I had been together and deeply in love for a year before we got married. But he's changed a lot in the past couple months. (Ever since we said the I do) he temper has gotten awful, all we do is fight. He doesn't want to allow me to dress how I used to. Doesn't let me see friends. He won't let me go back to school or get a vehicle of my own. He talks to other guys online. Tells people how much he hates me. But to my face he says he loves me and cares about me. Our fights start about any little thing you can think of, and blow out of proportion and turn into huge fights. I've heard that the first 5 years are supposed to be the best but the first 5 months have been an emotional roller coaster. He loves me one day and hates me the next. The only time I get attention is right before bed and only if he wants sex. Other than that I just don't matter until he needs money or cigarettes. He won't get a job. I pay for all of his expenses. Including the car (that is not mine) that he "lets" me drive to work. I feel he may have cheated. He leaves with his friends and doesnt ever let me know where he is when im at work, and gets mad if i ever want to go out. hes really isolated me from my friends and family. He's extremely controlling and mentally abusive. He's basically destroying me. And I just don't know if I should keep trying anymore. He used to treat me like gold. Now I'm just dirt on his boots. Happy valentines day-
(link)
I'm sorry you are having a rotten valentines day!

Everything you have mentioned are all big time warning flags that you are in an abusive relationship. Keeping you from friends & or family, being controlling, not allowing you to go to school.

As much as I hate to see relationships end, I really don't think you are in a relationship that is healthy for you. You are being abused mentally right now, I am afraid it could escalate into physical abuse if you stay. You really should not be putting up with any of his behavior.

I suggest you find yourself a new place & start fresh. I know it will be hard to do. I can't with good conscious tell you to stay and work on this. It just has all the warning flags of him being an abuser. Should you decide to stay anyway, please, find a friend to confide in & have a safe place to run to.

Good luck


im a 13 year old girl me and my best friend have been bffs since 4th grade and she knows that i say stupid things without thinking like alot but she still gets really mad like i kissed her boyfriend pissed off at me when it has happened so many times before she sohuld know that i dont mean it why is she still getting mad after all these years (link)
Because she doesn't like it maybe? Because you continue to do it when you know it upsets her, shows a great deal of disrespect for your friend.
If you know you do stupid things that you don't mean...Its time to stop it. Its not a good excuse.
The older you get the more people won't accept that kind of behavior. Start working on it today.


I am 25yrs old, am a female. I saw my period december 1, 2013 and saw it again after making sex december 27, 2013 (link)
Thats wonderful but what is your question?


I am 13 and a playful girl.I have my periods since I was 12 and they are quite regular.My periods came on 24th of this month as usual.My periods last for 8 to 9 days and after the 6th day of my period,I started spotting which lasts for 3 days.I am going to my uncles house on this friday(and there will be all my cousins)and I play with them alot.I am still spotting and the day after tomorrow,I am going to my uncles house.Please help me and give me easy home remedies to stop my spotting. (link)
There aren't any home remedies for spotting. I am a little concerned that your periods last so long. It might be a good idea to see a doctor and tell him/her what you are experiencing. A doctor is the only one who may be able to help.


Me and my fiancé had unprotected sex 5 times in a 6 day period. After the 5th time I got what I though was my "period" but it lasted 3 days and was light. About a week later I started having light cramps and discharging. Lately I've been hungry nauseated, extremely tired, bad back ache, and dizzy. It's now been 2 weeks and 4 or 5 days since I last had unprotected intercourse. Could I be pregnant? I'd be extremely happy if I am :) (link)
Any time you have unprotected sex there is a chance of pregnancy. Periods can be light & can last only three days. I'd say you had yours. No period is a good sign of pregnancy. Nausea/vomiting can be a symptom early on. A pregnancy test would be a good idea to be sure.


ok so me and Girl#1 have been best friends since 4th grade and we were fine till I me and girl#2 me and girl#2 got really close and I guess girl#1 got jealous or something so in 7th grade girl#1 started saying things about girl#2 like 'why do you like girl#2' girl#2 is so weird' why are you friends with girl#2' and much more then I said 'I don't care if girl#2 is weird she's my friend' then a couple of months later girl #1 stopped talking to me then my English teacher put me in a group which included two of my friends girl#1 and her friend so as I'm doing my work I see girl#1 writing stuff in a sticky note/ post-it and her friend said 'but I don't know who you're talking bout' then girl#1 wrote something down and her friend looked at me. so my question is why would she tell everybody our business but when someone comes up and ask me 'Why don't you talk to girl#1 anymore' I say 'we just drifted apart because we only have one class together' I didn't lie we really do only have one class together so why would she do that ?? (link)
Looks like girl #1 is probably jealous. She may have good reason to be! She must still be pretty upset & if you are in a class group with her you could probably find the time to talk to her a little if you wanted to. If you want to stay friends, and you CAN stay friends, even if you have limited time to spend with each other, you need to make an effort to talk to her & at least try to be polite.

I wouldn't take it bad that she talked about the situation with another friend. If she just didn't care it wouldn't have bothered her enough to have mentioned it. She probably should have talked to YOU about it, but sometimes if friends drift apart that's hard to do. I mean she has no idea weather or not you might still want to be friends.

Do make an effort to talk to her. She was your friend for a long time.


19 Female
For the past few months I have had episodes of blacking out and passing out and getting very dizzy etc at random times. It can be when I am just sitting down or walking, anything. The past few weeks it has gotten really bad, like almost an every day thing.
I went to the doctor and got an EKG on my heart and everything was okay.
I am bulimic, which my doctor doesn't know, but I was wondering if maybe that was the cause. I am a healthy weight and everything but I know that being bulimic is really bad for your electrolytes, i'm not sure if this could be the cause.
I don't know what to do because I obviously don't want to tell anyone about this, but I don't know what else to do.
Any insight on what could be wrong? (link)
Your bulimia is probably the cause. You need to go back to the doctor and you need to tell him about it. Do not put it off because it is a life threatening condition. Seriously, do not put it off any longer.

http://www.something-fishy.org/dangers/dangers.php


Me and my Boyfriend have been using condoms for the passed 4 months since he took my virginity. None has ever broke or had holes in them and no sperm has got on me. My period is due in about 5 days and I usually will feel me starting to cramp. I'm feeling it off and on now but I don't know if I'm imagining it? I'm really paranoid about this and I need advice from someone who knows and can help, please. I'm seriously freaking out. My period isn't late or anything. Its due in about a weel or less. It switches around sometimes so should I be worried? Your advice would be very helpful. Thanks! (link)
If you are absolutley certain that no sperm got in you vagina, you are probably not pregnant. There is always a small chance but chances are you will be fine.

I don't know how old you are, but I would suggest you try to get yourself on the pill if at all possible. You don't want to be feeling paranoid every month!

Relax, I'm sure you will get your period soon.


What is a natural look with makeup that i can wear that looks pretty? (link)
The best natural look is just not to get carried away. Go lightly on everything & you will look great!




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