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I have gone from younggrandma to just yg. Now,
I am using my real name.
I don't think anyone who knows me will have trouble figuring out who that is!


I have been gone a while dealing with things in my own life. I am back now to help once again. Do not expect answers from me that just tell you what you want to hear. Life is to short for nonsense. :)
Website: advicenators forum
E-mail: krickel@gmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: KANSAS
Occupation: Homemaker,EMT, ER worker, Medical assistant
Member Since: March 4, 2005
Answers: 10014
Last Update: July 18, 2014
Visitors: 481509


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I moved away from my crush and he dropped hints that. He liked me and all of his friends would tease him that he liked me and I liked him back after some time and he was so sweet to me . He knew I was moving away and helped me take my stuff out of my locker and said bye to me and signed my binder. I tryed so hard telling him that I liked him but I didn't get to because my friends where there the whole time and I didn't get an alone moment to tell him . And my friend said that he kind of likes her and my crush was friends with my friend . And my friend didnt know that i liked him back and I don't know what to do because I miss him and I don't know if it's true and I'm kind of sad that he forgot about me so quickly because I moved away like 1 month ago. He dosnt have a phone and i don't know if he has an email to talk to him so please help I don't know what to do . (link)
You don't say how far away from him you moved.
If it is a long distance then you may as well just move on & try to find someone else to crush on closer to where you are.

Young guys just don't stick with any one girl for long. You didn't really have a relationship so he probably didn't think a lot about it. Since you were moving, even if he did like you, a relationship under those circumstances probably isn't the greatest idea. To have a good romantic relationship, you need to be able to see each other & date & stuff.

There is no reason why you can't look him up on Facebook or something. Lots of times people include their email if they don't mind people writing to them. No reason you can't become friends. No telling what might happen in the future.


I hate myself and have wanted to die for many many years now, can anyone help me accomplish this? do NOT lecture me or try to scare me or talk me out of it. PLEASE I only want help, suggestions, know success, etc. so I can proceed now. The sooner the better, ive put this off for way too long. I have made attempts and have obviously failed. Please help me to finally successfully end my useless life. I am an organ donor and would prefer to help anyone I can with what I have, I do not need it. I only need 1 thing, and that is death, this life means nothing. I do not help anyone or anything, I am lost, lonely, confused, yet absolutely DONE. Being here could be hell. (link)
Life can really suck at times. I think everyone has probably gone through something at one time or another and thought it would just be easier to end it all.

Then you wake up one day and think, man, I'm glad I'm still here. First...If anyone were to give you advice on killing yourself, they would be gone from here so fast it would make your head spin. Just not gonna happen.

Second, How would anyone know what works well & what doesn't? Probably only those with medical knowledge. They won't tell you how because they just don't do things like that.

Third, do you really want to depend on the advice of some stranger on a subject such as this? Do you realize how many down right whack jobs we have to ban just because they give rotten advice?

Admittedly not as many as we used to, but still...there are idiots out there who get their jollies telling people the most harmful things. Some just because they don't know as much as they think they do. Others just because there are mean people in this world with nothing better to do.

Stop with the attempts. Instead of trying to off yourself, put that energy into fixing what ails you. Go see a doctor. I've known plenty of people who have wanted to end it all. A couple were successful. All they got for their actions was dead. They didn't FIX anything. All they did was make life hell for family and friends.

You can be far more useful to others by fixing yourself & then getting educated to help others fix themselves. Your organs won't be worth crap to anyone. By the time you are found they would be useless. Your methods would probably make them useless anyway.

So, no good useful advice for offing yourself here. I do hope to hear someday that you got off your butt and went out there and found help for yourself. You really are worth the effort ya know.


I'm 13 years old and i've had my period for a few years, I just used a tampon for the first time last night, I went to bed with it in, at about 2 pm the next day I tried to take it out and I was in tears the whole time, so I stopped and tried again in 30 minutes, I got it out, but it still felt like I was going to scream. It's about 10 pm and I haven't put one in. I'm not to fond of them, I can feel it, and it kind of hurts. I sit down and like, I know it's there. Please help.. (link)
Its OK to sleep with a tampon in, but you should never leave one in for longer than 8 hrs. When you do they can be painful to remove. There is also the risk of toxic shock syndrome if left in for a long time. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001676/

That being said, tampons are not for everyone. If they don't feel comfortable to you, just use a pad. Keep some tampons around if you want to swim in the summertime & just use a pad the rest of the time. Nothing at all wrong with doing that.


Hi, so I'm a gay male. I've been married for only half a year. My husband and I had been together and deeply in love for a year before we got married. But he's changed a lot in the past couple months. (Ever since we said the I do) he temper has gotten awful, all we do is fight. He doesn't want to allow me to dress how I used to. Doesn't let me see friends. He won't let me go back to school or get a vehicle of my own. He talks to other guys online. Tells people how much he hates me. But to my face he says he loves me and cares about me. Our fights start about any little thing you can think of, and blow out of proportion and turn into huge fights. I've heard that the first 5 years are supposed to be the best but the first 5 months have been an emotional roller coaster. He loves me one day and hates me the next. The only time I get attention is right before bed and only if he wants sex. Other than that I just don't matter until he needs money or cigarettes. He won't get a job. I pay for all of his expenses. Including the car (that is not mine) that he "lets" me drive to work. I feel he may have cheated. He leaves with his friends and doesnt ever let me know where he is when im at work, and gets mad if i ever want to go out. hes really isolated me from my friends and family. He's extremely controlling and mentally abusive. He's basically destroying me. And I just don't know if I should keep trying anymore. He used to treat me like gold. Now I'm just dirt on his boots. Happy valentines day-
(link)
I'm sorry you are having a rotten valentines day!

Everything you have mentioned are all big time warning flags that you are in an abusive relationship. Keeping you from friends & or family, being controlling, not allowing you to go to school.

As much as I hate to see relationships end, I really don't think you are in a relationship that is healthy for you. You are being abused mentally right now, I am afraid it could escalate into physical abuse if you stay. You really should not be putting up with any of his behavior.

I suggest you find yourself a new place & start fresh. I know it will be hard to do. I can't with good conscious tell you to stay and work on this. It just has all the warning flags of him being an abuser. Should you decide to stay anyway, please, find a friend to confide in & have a safe place to run to.

Good luck


im a 13 year old girl me and my best friend have been bffs since 4th grade and she knows that i say stupid things without thinking like alot but she still gets really mad like i kissed her boyfriend pissed off at me when it has happened so many times before she sohuld know that i dont mean it why is she still getting mad after all these years (link)
Because she doesn't like it maybe? Because you continue to do it when you know it upsets her, shows a great deal of disrespect for your friend.
If you know you do stupid things that you don't mean...Its time to stop it. Its not a good excuse.
The older you get the more people won't accept that kind of behavior. Start working on it today.


I am 25yrs old, am a female. I saw my period december 1, 2013 and saw it again after making sex december 27, 2013 (link)
Thats wonderful but what is your question?


I am 13 and a playful girl.I have my periods since I was 12 and they are quite regular.My periods came on 24th of this month as usual.My periods last for 8 to 9 days and after the 6th day of my period,I started spotting which lasts for 3 days.I am going to my uncles house on this friday(and there will be all my cousins)and I play with them alot.I am still spotting and the day after tomorrow,I am going to my uncles house.Please help me and give me easy home remedies to stop my spotting. (link)
There aren't any home remedies for spotting. I am a little concerned that your periods last so long. It might be a good idea to see a doctor and tell him/her what you are experiencing. A doctor is the only one who may be able to help.


Me and my fiancé had unprotected sex 5 times in a 6 day period. After the 5th time I got what I though was my "period" but it lasted 3 days and was light. About a week later I started having light cramps and discharging. Lately I've been hungry nauseated, extremely tired, bad back ache, and dizzy. It's now been 2 weeks and 4 or 5 days since I last had unprotected intercourse. Could I be pregnant? I'd be extremely happy if I am :) (link)
Any time you have unprotected sex there is a chance of pregnancy. Periods can be light & can last only three days. I'd say you had yours. No period is a good sign of pregnancy. Nausea/vomiting can be a symptom early on. A pregnancy test would be a good idea to be sure.


ok so me and Girl#1 have been best friends since 4th grade and we were fine till I me and girl#2 me and girl#2 got really close and I guess girl#1 got jealous or something so in 7th grade girl#1 started saying things about girl#2 like 'why do you like girl#2' girl#2 is so weird' why are you friends with girl#2' and much more then I said 'I don't care if girl#2 is weird she's my friend' then a couple of months later girl #1 stopped talking to me then my English teacher put me in a group which included two of my friends girl#1 and her friend so as I'm doing my work I see girl#1 writing stuff in a sticky note/ post-it and her friend said 'but I don't know who you're talking bout' then girl#1 wrote something down and her friend looked at me. so my question is why would she tell everybody our business but when someone comes up and ask me 'Why don't you talk to girl#1 anymore' I say 'we just drifted apart because we only have one class together' I didn't lie we really do only have one class together so why would she do that ?? (link)
Looks like girl #1 is probably jealous. She may have good reason to be! She must still be pretty upset & if you are in a class group with her you could probably find the time to talk to her a little if you wanted to. If you want to stay friends, and you CAN stay friends, even if you have limited time to spend with each other, you need to make an effort to talk to her & at least try to be polite.

I wouldn't take it bad that she talked about the situation with another friend. If she just didn't care it wouldn't have bothered her enough to have mentioned it. She probably should have talked to YOU about it, but sometimes if friends drift apart that's hard to do. I mean she has no idea weather or not you might still want to be friends.

Do make an effort to talk to her. She was your friend for a long time.


19 Female
For the past few months I have had episodes of blacking out and passing out and getting very dizzy etc at random times. It can be when I am just sitting down or walking, anything. The past few weeks it has gotten really bad, like almost an every day thing.
I went to the doctor and got an EKG on my heart and everything was okay.
I am bulimic, which my doctor doesn't know, but I was wondering if maybe that was the cause. I am a healthy weight and everything but I know that being bulimic is really bad for your electrolytes, i'm not sure if this could be the cause.
I don't know what to do because I obviously don't want to tell anyone about this, but I don't know what else to do.
Any insight on what could be wrong? (link)
Your bulimia is probably the cause. You need to go back to the doctor and you need to tell him about it. Do not put it off because it is a life threatening condition. Seriously, do not put it off any longer.

http://www.something-fishy.org/dangers/dangers.php


Me and my Boyfriend have been using condoms for the passed 4 months since he took my virginity. None has ever broke or had holes in them and no sperm has got on me. My period is due in about 5 days and I usually will feel me starting to cramp. I'm feeling it off and on now but I don't know if I'm imagining it? I'm really paranoid about this and I need advice from someone who knows and can help, please. I'm seriously freaking out. My period isn't late or anything. Its due in about a weel or less. It switches around sometimes so should I be worried? Your advice would be very helpful. Thanks! (link)
If you are absolutley certain that no sperm got in you vagina, you are probably not pregnant. There is always a small chance but chances are you will be fine.

I don't know how old you are, but I would suggest you try to get yourself on the pill if at all possible. You don't want to be feeling paranoid every month!

Relax, I'm sure you will get your period soon.


What is a natural look with makeup that i can wear that looks pretty? (link)
The best natural look is just not to get carried away. Go lightly on everything & you will look great!


Ok my boyfriend stayed at my house. Hes 22 Android in 20 the started kissing me. Then started taking my closes off. The took off his closes then stared putting his dick in smokies pussy. Its been a month i took a home pregraunt test, Android it came postive. What do i do????:( (link)
Tell your mom & see a doctor. You're pregnant.



I know you aren't a doctor but that you do have ER and medical training of some sort. That's why I am writing while I won't mistake your advice as a diagnosis maybe you'll have a lead on this I can then ask my doctor.

I saw my doctor less than a week ago and described something to him but he brushed it off. It's still bothering me. He said this happens "sometimes" to people but didn't investigate why with me.

These last few weeks I have been experiencing that sensation that feels like when you really have to urinate and have held it in but can't anymore. It's all the time and I never have to piss.

The bladder is empty. I can't sit down even without feeling this discomfort the majority of the time. Is this what they call a UTI? What do you think it might be? I need a few leads as the doctor brushed it aside as "nothing to worry about". There's definitely a feeling of physical pressure.

The other thing is when I first start my urine stream it flows the way it is supposed to. There feels like more is in the tank and if there is I really have to strain to release it.

I'm NOT sexually active. I am on medication for bipolar but my blood work always comes back clean as a whistle and healthy and have no issues as it's drawn constantly. Any idea would put me at ease as I'm wound up about it. (link)
I have to say first off that I am very concerned that a doctor would blow off your symptoms as nothing to worry about. It does sound like a UTI.

Do you have any pain at all when you do go?
I think you did a great job of describing your symptoms. I just think the doctor didn't want to be bothered for some reason. Might be time to find a new doctor if this one doesn't listen.

Make an appointment & tell the doctor it isn't going away. If you don't get some action then find another doctor who will listen.


I'm 10 and my friend is 9 and her dad abuses her and I think her brother also or he did abuse her brother because he's 20 now well he touches her and stuff and he forces her to have sex and he put glass up her "down there" and she told me but she told me I can't tell anyone but she tells me everyday now stories and its sad and I'm scared for her. Her brother protected her but now no one knows where he is please help me (link)
Your friend needs to tell someone who is older that will listen to her and help her. A teacher, an Aunt, maybe even YOUR mother. If she has nobody she feels she can trust, she needs to call the police. This is a crime.

Since you are underage, you cannot have a column on the site right now. We won't delete until you get a few good answers but we will have to soon.

Its great you want to help your friend. If she doesn't do something, talk to your mom about this. She might be mad at first but you can't let her be abused.



18/f

My family is in a tough situation.
My mom has been drinking since I was in 8th grade. It was never this bad though. Before, she would always drink and get drunk but it'd only last a few weeks until my dad made her throw it out.
Then eventually she'll start hiding it.
But now, she is drunk all day and all night for about 5 months. I left for college in another state though.
As of right now, she's been living with this other man, cheating on my dad. She's there because that guy will give her all the alcohol she wants. My dad is mad of course, but they've been married for 20 years and he loves her and cares about her and wants to help her. She's a really good lady but it's the drinking that screwed her up.
Whenever she's here, she lies all the time and just picks fights with my dad. She is still living in the past, bringing up things that happened along time ago but is no longer a problem.
Even my aunt came over and my mom was bringing up things when they were kids that bothered her.
So there are many things she has been holding onto.
My younger brother, he's 16, he's in juvi right now for running away, stealing a car, drunk driving, hit and run. She blames him for her drinking. But when things were ok with him, she was still doing it.

So obviously, if she wanted to get help, she would but she doesn't want it. She told us she knows she has a problem but she can fix it herself.
She was looking up videos to stop but she said she doesn't have enough will power.

I'm not going back to college this semester so that I can stay with my dad.

He's planning on moving so that my mom can get away from this guy because right now, that's the only way she can drink and so my brother can get away from the drugs and his friends here. But right now, we're looking to help her.

We've tried an intervention type thing but that didn't work. Some other family members have talked to her too.
She won't go to rehab and she used to go to some AA meetings but that didn't work.
I know she has to want it but there has to be something else we can do.
I can't just be patient because it's been going on for too long. She needs help or she can die.
Someone told me about hypnosis. That would cost about 1,200 if it works. We would just have to convince her to go.
My dad found some CDs online and saw good reviews.

The thing is, she needs real help and me and my dad don't know what can work.
If you know anyone who has been like this and know what helped them please let me know.
I know other people who were alcoholics but they were never this bad. No one I know has ever been in a situation like this.
Thanks for the help! (link)
Before your Dad decides to up and move away you both and any siblings need to get yourself to an
AL ANON meeting. I have taken some classes on
this and believe me, moving and putting a halt on your lives will NOT help.

If you move she will find some other way to drink. If she even went with you in the first place. Alcoholism is tough to kick. The average person will go to rehab & AA meeting 3 or 4 times before they fall far enough to hit rock bottom & take the help. IF they are lucky.

She cannot fix it herself. If she could she would have done so by now. What you & your family need to do is learn to live without guilt about HER problem. Don't put your lives on hold. Just try a meeting or two. Meet people living with the same problem. It will help you all.


im 17 female almost 18
and im head over heels for this guy, david. him and me just work so well he is like my bestie who i can kiss and be a absolute moron with and he thinks it cute. we have been unofficially dating for over 6 months. i want to date him but he has really bad depression.. so we have been taking it slow. im now doubting if its a good idea to go into a relationship purely cause he still isnt sure its a good idea.. but i dont want to lose him and i couldnt just be friends with him.
ideas? (link)
Why can't you be friends with him? Just curious. :)

If you both are having doubts, and it sounds like you are, listen to your instincts. As was said before me depression can be very difficult to live with. Not only for the sufferer but for the partner as well. My hubby has it and before he got help with it I walked on egg shells & had stress like you wouldn't believe waiting for the next explosion.

Stay friends if you want, but I really think you should follow your instincts. At least for now.


okay i'm currently 16 I turn 17 in july

I really love my bf and he telling alot of people thagt he believes
i'm the perfect girl he is too 16 almost 17.he tells me that he is ready to settle down and that he wants to get married and have a kid.I really love him alot and yes he does smoke weed and cigarette and yes my parents know he does.he is a really good guy but something is holding me back he is a bit controlling like he gets mad if I talk about other guys and if I go a full two days J seeing him he threatens to take his own life and then he says that we need to runaway and get married idk I love him and always will it's just thode two things that's hurting me (link)
To answer your topic question, I don't think you are. Its not you necessarily, its mostly the guy who thinks he is ready to marry and have kids.

You are a bit young yet. But, threatening to kill himself & being controlling are immature to say the least.

I think you know all this already. If you have to question it, its not right for you. Who knows what might change in the future, but right now is not the time.


Hiii my boobs hurt when I wake up but when I wear a bra it doesn't actually hurt that much? (link)
Maybe you are laying on them crooked. :)

If wearing a bra helps & you don't mind sleeping with it on, do that. Sore boobs are no fun.


20/f Its like this - I'm a a 20 years old, and i have nothing to show for it. I don't have any work history, the only completed schooling that I have is a high school diploma, but that's it. It's hard to find a job, I mean well I'm not a people person, so even thinking of being a cashier, waitress, etc. makes my skin crawl, and no its, not that i hate people, its what i think they will think of me. I rarely go outside, and most of the time when i do do its night time. Sometimes its a struggle for me just to get out of the bed, my old doctor prescribed me zoloft, i informed that it wasn't working, he just up the dosage to 75mg (which is still not working), i know I'm diagnosed with depression, but he never informed on what type. Sometimes I cry myself to sleep at night, sometimes i feel very agitated. i feel like a FAILURE. I want to do more with my life, i WANT to successful, but its like i can't. I've been out of school going on 3 years and i haven't accomplished anything, all of my friends are in college or working or both, living their lives, and im doing nothing. Walking to the post office from my house which is like 500 feet away seems like a journey. I barely even talk to any of my friends anymore, i barely talk to anyone anymore, I feel like I've slowly fallen off the face of the earth and no one cares. i really want to go to job corps (trade school) but its almost like college, where you go and live on campus, and im almost terrified to go because of all the people, i keep trying to tell myself it could be good, but idk i just feel scared. does anyone else have a problem similar to this or knows anyone who does? any thoughts acnd comments will be helpful. thank you in advance (link)
Well, you are only 20 so a big work history isn't
expected.

You need to keep seeing your doctor until you get your meds right. It sometimes takes a while. You are NOT a failure & you can get better. I understand you want to get out in the world & get a job & all. Be patient. Call that doctor & make an appointment.

I know several people who have done the job corps thing & really enjoyed it. Once you get your meds right I think you should go for it!





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