ask karenR

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I have gone from younggrandma to just yg. Now,
I am using my real name.
I don't think anyone who knows me will have trouble figuring out who that is!

I have been gone a while dealing with things in my own life. I am back now to help once again. Do not expect answers from me that just tell you what you want to hear. Life is to short for nonsense. :)
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Gender: Female
Location: KANSAS
Occupation: Homemaker,EMT, ER worker, Medical assistant
Member Since: March 4, 2005
Answers: 10037
Last Update: April 23, 2015
Visitors: 488447

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At lunch time i sit with all my friends and stuff and later on in lunch some guys come join us well theres this ine guy named Brian and sometimes he'll message my shoulders just outr of the clear blu,and flirts with me and other stuff but shuld i flirt back?? I really like him but he has a GF
I jst need some ideas please ill rate (link)
Of course you flirt back.Flirting never hurt anybody that I know of.He could be trying to make the gf jealous but you don't know that for sure.So flirt your heart out.Maybe he's interested.

I have this aquaintence that I see on campus from time to time. We went to the same high school. 21/f. We had this class together and some girls were talking about her and being really catty because she has lots of money and she is sorta fake but not offensive. She has never been anything but nice to me. I didn't appreciate that those chicks that didn't even know her were judging her. I still see her every week and I think about that often. Should I say anything or is it just water under the bridge? (link)
I wouldn't say anything to HER about it.I think she probably just doesn't know how to act any differently.Next time the others bring it up you should tell THEM that, hey I went to high school with her and she has always been nice to me.Sometimes people will cut down someone because they are jealous of them...That is probably the case here.Just put your opinion out there if it comes up again and leave it at that.

I think I have a problem. You see I am terribly clumsy so I bump into stuff,fall, and trip alot. As a result I get really bumped and scratched up. My problem comes in with the healing. While my wounds are healing I enjoy the sensation of the pain. I enjoy it so much that when they scab over I tear them off so I can feel the pain all over again. I don't bump into stuff on purpose. But I do enjoy the reprecussions alot. 21/f. Is something wrong with me? Could this lead to a cutting fettish? (link)
Your not bumping into things etc on purpose THAT YOU KNOW OF.Could be doing it subcontiously.You need to talk to a professonal about this before it gets worse.Any ER can get you in touch with someone to help you out.

There is this girl that I used to be really good friends with but she ended our friendship because she found new friends. I was fine with it because she sort of just stopped hanging out with me because I wasn't "punk enough" to hang out with. I didn't really care that she ended the friendship but now everyday she acts like we are still friends. Today she blew up in me & my friends face because we heard from someone that she was talking about us again (she's done this before and said she would quit because she's scared of me and my new friends) and she started screaming and got this really scared look on her face. Plus yesterday in our Science class me and my friends were talking and talking about my friends religion (Jahoba Witness) and my ex-friend walks over and says "so is that a TV show or something?" and we all told her it was a religion and she said "So you're a Jahoba and a Witness? Well I'm prejudice" We all looked at her in shock and she later told us that she has no idea what prejudice means anyway. The whole problem is that she keeps talking about people and thinks that makes her cool. My friends want to jump her but I don't know what to do. We aren't friends at all not even FWB. She just won't leave me and my other friends alone. How can me and my friends tell her to go away? (link)
Tell her to talk to you again when she has something nice to say about somebody.What a wicked little girl! It sounds to me like she could be jealous that you have new friends.She is trying to get your attention.You just have to tell her straight up that she needs an attitude adjustment and you aren't a mechanic so get lost.You don't need friends like her. tell her to grow up.

my boyfriend always fingers me and eats me out but the problem is i never have an orgasm. i was wondering why that is or if theres anything i can do to have one?
14/f (link)
If he's your age he probably just isn't doing it right.Even if he's a little older he probably isn't doing it right.I can't believe i'm telling you this! If you think it would feel better elsewhere you have to tell him where.He doesn't just automatically know these things.You'll just have to experiment until you get it right.When you do you'll know it!I hope that didn't sound mean my saying he isn't doing it right...that wasn't my intention there is just no other way to say it! NOt his fault.You teach him!okay? Feel free to ask more if the need....arises.

this is kinda imbarrasing to ask... but i gotta know. i shave down there, ya know? and well sometimes it gets gross. i usually wait like 2 days before doin it again, but i dont know its wierd. and sometimes it even bleeds! OH! and i get these little red bumps. is this normal? is there somethin i can do to make this stop?
thanks in advance! (link)
Put some powder on the bumps.They have a medicated one that burns a little but will heal the bumps pretty fast.Wait until they heal a little before you shave again.Be sure to use a good shaving lotion too. It sounds like razor burn.It is bleeding because you're shaving off the bumps! It's a normal thing, nothing to worry about.Use lots of the shaving lotion okay? And use a new razor too.That will hopefully keep it from happening to often.And don't be embarrassed you won't know unless you ask!

My dog barks at the slightest movement or sound. He chases my four cats around and when hes on a walk he chases cars. He is a Border Collie, so it is natural for him to try to herd things. He is so out of control sometimes that he will see the neighbor dogs from the inside window and will throw himself at the window, barking like a maniac. What do you suggest I do? (link)
Dogs are the best aren't they? Maybe you could have a vet give him some valium.LOL.Really though I think a vet could perhaps give him something to calm him down somewhat.Probably not completley.If not he could suggest something.Most of the time (around here anyway) they will give you advice over the phone and you won't even have to take him in.

I have a Blue Healer in my back yard so I do know a little of what your going through.He does a real good job of rounding up the grandkids now and then.Cat's don't hang out much around here either.Take him to the vet or call one and see if they can think of anything to help you.Good luck.

ok when i was 13 i dated my boyfriend nows best friend... i am now 16... he was my first love... i was in love with nathan (my boyfriend nows best friend) for almost 4 years....i have just recently got over him... i got over him when i was 15... i am now 16... paul(my boyfriend now) doesnt understand how much work it took to get over nathan... now paul still talks to nathan.. but i need nathan out of my life and paul is bringing him back into it... i dont know what to do to keep paul but also keep nathan out of my life... i dont want to tell him to chose cuz thats not right.... please help!!!!!!
i do rate! (link)
First of all are you sure Paul is drug free? I sure hope so. You don't even want to deal with that kind of mess.

Is it possible that Paul is trying to help Nathan out, maybe trying to get him to get help, or are they just friends? I'm just full of questions tonight! I have a bad habit of thinking out loud, sorry.Maybe you should ask yourself these things though.He's really not much of a friend if he isn't though. So that brings us right back where we started!

The ideal situation would be for you to ditch him. But, I don't suppose that's possible for you yet. I do think he should have more respect for your feelings on this.It's not nice to make him choose,however Nathan is bad news.Never mind that he's your ex he has major problems that could get Paul in trouble too if he were in the wrong place at the wrong time.Then where would you be?

I don't think you are asking to much in this case to tell him that you don't like him hanging around with Nathan.Tell him you are concerned for his saftey and what it would do to you if he should get caught up in Nathans problems.

No matter what you decide to do, You will probably ALWAYS have some feelings for Nathan.Bad as he is today he was your first love.
We always tend to remember those guys! I sure hope all works out for you.Sorry I couldn't be more help.Feel free to ask again if you think of anything else that would be of help.

how can i tell him that i love talkin to him becuz he makes me laugh he is so funny but what do i do (link)
I think he knows that you love talking to him or you wouldn't be laughing! He must enjoy making you laugh as well. I think this guy know you like him.Maybe he's just shy about saying so yet.
You just keep laughing with him and I think you'll see results soon.If this doesn't answer your question feel free to give me more details.I don't mind long ones.Keep smiling!:}

so a few weeks ago i started a new diet. i'm just eating healthier; more fruit, vegetables and healthier alternatives to food i used to eat. but ever since i started i've been having to go to the bathroom alot more. is this normal? will my body eventually get used to this new food? (link)
It sure will! It's normal you're eating more fiber and stuff.Glad to know i'm not the only one dieting!If you need any encouragment to stick to it drop me a line anytime!:}

Here's the deal. I am 21/f. My mother and father are divorced. My father has a son (with another woman) and he has my little brother(with my mom) my whole brother stays with my mom. Every since they split 10 years ago my father has not been doing much of anything for my brother. He only gives him something on christmas and his birthday. He hardly ever sees him and I am furious. I feel he should pay child support to my mother for my whole brother. My momma is having to carry all the weight that he should be sharing. My half brother gets to see daddy all the time. Why should my half brother get all and my whole brother gets next to nothing. If it matters My half brother is 13 (born out of wedlock) and my whole brother is 12) Should I push her to stick him for child support. She feels that since my dad and my step mom raised me she has no right because he didn't stick her for child support. My mom did things for me though. Should I push her or just back off.
The lack of money is keeping my brother from things he would rather do like piano lessons, boy scouts and movie going. I don't think its fair. Help me decide! (link)
I think I would give her some encouragment.Your dad is just as responsible for your little brother as he was for you and your half.Be careful that you guys don't hold any resentment for the littlest one. Your dads behavior isn't his fault (not that you do anyway just mentioning).It's nice he thinks of him at holidays but he is responsible for every aspect of his life until he is at least 18.Your mother shouldn't carry the burden alone.I totally agree with you. Push a little.

I am ALWAYS craving sugar! This wouldn't be so bad, but I have braces now and have to stop eating it :S I tried eating small amounts but it is still messing up my teeth so I have to stop almost entirely. But I'm so weak, lol, and always eat food with a high sugar content! How can I stop, or at least lessen, the cravings and eat less sugar? I don't like fruit so please don't suggest that :) (link)
They make a lot of pretty good sugar free stuff nowadays.Give some of it a try.It does take a little getting used to but once you do it's great.

Ale(girl) and i(girl) are really close. She means the world to me and we gone to each other for everything but now she acts as if she hates me and i dont know what to do?.. help me please (link)
You gotta ask her.Otherwise you'll never know.When you find out let us know and maybe we can be better help to you, okay?

i`m a freshman in high school. ever since i was about 4 or 5, i've had an excessive bladder problem i guess you could say. when somebody makes me laugh, i start to piss myself. it's been happening lately at school and volleyball practice, and i have nothing to cover it up with! is there any type of medicine i could take, or anything that could help prevent this or something.. ? please help

if you're going to laugh or make fun of me, you'll be rated a one, and i'm gonna report you. =) (link)
I wouldn't make fun.You need to go to a doctor.There is medicine they can give you for this problem.When you get a little older if you still have the problem there is operation to be had...that would be down the road though.Don't give up hope it can be made better for you.

I'm a really good singer. All of my friends have said so, and are threatening to take me too American Idol when I'm 16. And I love to sing. But when I go to do it in front of some people I get really nervous and choke up. Any suggestions on how to get rid of my nervous-ness??

oh my,just thinking about that Simon character would scare the hell out of me.Practice, practice, and more practice.In school,at home, wherever and when ever you get a chance to practice in front of a crowd.No doubt you will still be nervous at something like American Idol but it would help you prepare.Hope to see you on the tube someday!

My good friend Rose just started dating my ex-boyfriend Justin. We had been broken up for quite a while, but I am still confused about how I fell about Justin, although I think I am mostly over him. I am also seeing other people. But why is it when I see them together when I go out, that I get jealous, or more upset? (link)
I think it is a perfectly natural reaction.You may still have a few small feelings still hanging around somewhere.All you can do is make the best of it i'm afraid.Maybe you will get used to it if they go out long enough.You might also tell Rose up front that since you know both of them, you don't want any details of their romance.Good luck to you.

(16 female) The problem is I have this boyfriend, whom I care about a lot but I dont really love him like he loves me. He thinks everything in our relationship is perfect but its not. We really have problems. Well, its more of i have problems with our relationship that i really need to work through. Recently, I realized that i don't want be with him any longer, but i don't know how to break up with him. I don't want to hurt him or break his heart but either way i do it i will. I just need someone to tell me a way to break up with him without me breaking his heart too badly and him never speaking to me again. And if there is a way to do this, please give me the courage to go through with it. I am soooo scared it makes no sense. I am terrified of hurting him. Pleeeeseee Heeeeelp (link)
You just have to tell him what you feel.That you don't want to hurt him but you really want to be alone for awhile.Let him know you still want to be friends and everything. No doubt his feelings will be hurt he will get over it.Don't wait until the end of a date or anything to do it either.That makes it seem REALLY over if you know what I mean.Tell him early on and then try to have some fun after so he feels you really mean it about being friends.

ook . me and this guy have been off and on rellie sice 6th grade but like went out for a couple weeks brokeup stayed broken up for about a 5 months and did the same routine till like recent in 8th grade . [its not like we didnt date other people] but recently we went out and like rellie not for a couple of weeks but a couple of months. and then we brokeup because we got into a fite and then madeup and have sort of been together ever since but recently hes been asking me out again n i want to go out with him but like i enjoy the way we are now . liek kissing all the time and hangingout everysingle day but he wants more . i relie dont want more than that becase hes differnt when we go out . i telll him that and he doesnt understand. hes been dipping[chewing tabacco] smokeing and takieng steriods and i dont rellie like it n hes been haveign roid rages at me and i like him but i dont know what to do .
Well if he's really taking steroids there ya go.That rude behavior is a side effect.They can also be violent.Until he gets his shit together I would stay away from him all together. I'm sure that isn't what you want to hear but there ya go.

see i dont know what to do i like this guy alot but he wants me to tell him why i like him what should i do? (link)
Well, why do you like him? He's asking...start talking. Be honest now!

kay well, my (old) best friend was a guy his name was ryan.. he liked me..but he loved his ex girlfriend victorea (they were going out for a year on and off) me and him were soo close.. i liked him too.. but he is going back out with victoera. me and her are not friends AT ALL, she told ryan he cant hang out with me,But he still does but he tells people he hates me,and when i ask him he said brb to me (online) and idk who to belivie my other friends or ryan. but anyway i really really wanna be his friend is there a way maybe i can say something to him that can make us friends again? or tell him i love him or some thing?? please help

I RATE HIGH!! (link)
She is not real smart telling him who he can and can't be friends with or talk to.He is not real mature going along with it.He is groveling at her feet like a whipped pup.I don't believe I would tell him your feelings until he gets tired of being told what to do.Just continue to talk to him online if you enjoy that and hopefully he will get tired of her soon.THEN,you can say something if you feel the need.

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