askkailey
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Q: ok well my friend max is an athiest. he doesnt belive in any kind of god. hes like a science nerd so that probably has something to do with it. well i really want him to belive in God but i dont know how i can talk to him about it. we arent close enough to talk about that stuff. what should i do?
While I respect your desire to turn him to what you believe is "right", you need to know where your boundaries are. If he approaches you & asks you to introduce him to your religion, that's fine, but don't go stuffing your religion down his throat. It's not your place to do so. Imagine how you'd feel if someone tried stuffing a book about satan down your throat. I bet you wouldn't like it. The same thing goes for your friend- if you try overstepping your boundaries & forcing your religion on him, he's going to resent you. Converting him to your religion isn't the right thing to do, but respecting his beliefs is.

Q: ahhh! ok i am such a bad person!
i've been in love with the same guy for 2 years, and all along ive been trying to hack his email account to see if he has any emails from his gf's or about me or whatever! (i know! wrong wrong wronggg!) but here's the thing, his secret question was "favorite historical person" and ive been trying to guess it or years, guessing eveything from spongebob square pants to eleanor roosevelt, and then while doing my daily "try-to-hack-him" thing, i decided to google "favorite historcal person" and the first thing that came up was "Jesus" and im a christian (who sins a lot, even though i try not to..) but he's not, so i was like "pssh he doesnt have that as an answer, and if he does I WILL NOT HACK HIM" and guess what? i tried it - and it worked! and i wont to go in and read his emails so bad! but i did say i wouldnt do it if his answer was Jesus! I don't know WHY i did it, but i guess i feel it would be wrong doing something WROOONG using Christ's name.. so help me! i will not let go of it and just forget it! i will think about it every day, every imnute until i do it! ive considered sending him a anonymous email saying "change your secret question" so if im tempted i still cant do it.. but i want to! so badly! HELP PLEASE! maybe if you could help me find bible verses that can help in situations like these when you'r etempted to do smething bad? and just incase.. (incase i do it, like now..as soon as ive asked the question) could you help me with ohw to ask for forgiveness and maybe make sure it doesn't happen again?
help me please!! thank you!
You need to tell him. If you loved him, you'd trust him and not feel the need to hack him. Relationships cannot succeed without honesty, trust, and effective communication. By hacking him and then keeping it a secret, you have destroyed all three elements and are on a path to destroy your relationship. If you love him, respect him enough to be honest.

Q: ohkay, everyone is telling me that the world is going to end in 4 days (6-6-06) (the devil's number.) I AM REALLY SCARED OVER THIS. I CAN BARLEY SLEEP. im like pettrified. is what they're telling me true or is a myth? and do you believe it? and should i be scared?

thanks guys.
Never trust religion. I'm not one to disrespect people's religious beliefs, but when it comes to stuff like this, you have nothing to worry about.

Q: There is a guy I really like (who also has the slight potential of liking me back). He's very funny and actually very polite and nice. However, he doesn't seem to be a very devout Christian, because he cusses. Even though I cuss sometimes, I feel like he may have a bad influence on me in that way, and I know from Bible study that I'm supposed to surround myself with people who share my beliefs and are going to be a good influence. But there seems to be something wrong with that, because if I cuss now and then, I may be a kind of bad influence on others too, and they wouldn't want to be around ME either. I guess what I'm trying to ask is...would it be okay to continue to flirt with this guy and (if it works out right) date him? Sorry, this was kind of long and confusing... btw, I'm almost 16, if that helps any.
Honestly? Don't even bother spending your time flirting & getting to know him if you're going to keep yourself from getting close to him because he's not a "devout Christian". I don't mean to bash your religion, but that's just ridiculous. Either like him 100% as a person, or don't. Don't waste his time with that "well, we can talk, but we can't be close" crap.

Q: Ok. I'm a Christian, but I do not know the Bible cover to cover like some people do. I have 3 friends, who I love dearly, but they are just totally lost and I really want to save them but I have no clue as of how to do that. Like.. Ok.. here's their stories.

Billy 16-years-old: He's a terrible alcoholic who parties all the time and sometimes gets high but he is surely damned to hell because he has committed sexual immortality several times. He is one of those people who doesnt care about the Bible or God and makes jokes about religion at times. So I do not know how to talk to the guy.

Jessica 15-years-old: She's like my best friend but she's like never been to church. I've invited her before several times, but she always comes up with a reason not to go. And here lately we've lost friendship & she has lost herself to starting to drink because of peer pressure and she's became sexually active, so to say. And she's similiar to Billy, doesnt care.

Brittany 15-years-old: She's bisexual and she parties like every weekend and gets soo drunk & she cusses all the time but everytime I mention church or something of the sort, she cracks a joke & says something like, "Gosh you're such a goodie-goodie". And even though she's never had sex, she's did other stuff with girls and guys, so. I really want to help her & even though she goes to church often, she doesnt act Christian-like at all.

I really care for these people because they are like 3 of my best friends, but I have no clue has to how to help them. They are sooo young and if they were to die tomorrow or even today, they would go straight to hell & I really want to share my eternity with them in Heaven. So anyone with any advice, please help.
Your intentions are admirable, but it's best to leave them be. I'm an Atheist & I find that there is NOTHING more annoying than religious people who try to "save" me. Religion is absolutely fine, & if you're interested in living a Christian lifestyle, that's great for you, but don't try to shove it down my throat. If I was afraid of going to hell & wanted to be saved, I'd ask for help. Trying to save them is just going to come off as you sticking your nose where it doesn't belong. Let people live their lives the way they want to live it. You wouldn't like it if they tried to "drag you down" with them, would you? I sincerely doubt that, so reverse the situation & apply it there-- you wouldn't want them to influence you, so don't try to influence them.

Q: In your opinion (meaning that if you tell me what you think you'll get a 5), do you think that people should miss out on church in order to do yardwork, study for an exam, play in a soccer tournament, etc? I just want to know what qualifies as an acceptable excuse for not going to church. What other good reasons are there for missing church? -no I'm not trying to avoid going to church-

Thanks!
I think any reason is acceptable. Is your god going to condemn you & kick you out of your religion for not attending church? You don't have to attend church services to be a good (whatever religion).

My opinion is probably biased because I'm an Atheist. I don't bash people for having their beliefs--to each his own-- but in general I'm baffled by the concept of organized religion. Whether or not you're a good (whatever) shouldn't be decided by how often you're present in church; it's your character as a whole that counts-- whether you're a good person overall, following your religion, etc. It's great if you want to congregate with others of the same religious background to celebrate your god, but it shouldn't be a requirement. Your god should love you regardless, and even admire you more for doing something like schoolwork & working to make something of yourself instead of dropping everything to worship him.

You can pray anywhere. You don't need to drop everything to run to church & pray. People say they can feel their god's presence-- why must they go to a specific place to speak to him or show him their adoration?

Q: I am a once athiest who has now become agnostic and what I want to know is :
Why do you or why do you not believe in god?
Why should he/she/it be praised?
Why should I believe or not believe in god?
I do not believe in god. From a scientific standpoint, it's simply not logical. Just looking at religions, there are so many conflicting religions out there. They can't all be right- how do you choose just one and follow its teachings & be certain that you're pleasing your god?

I don't believe in a god, therefore, there is nothing to praise. Whatever makes you feel closer to god, I suppose. As far as I'm concerned, organized religion is a bunch of crap. No one should tell you what you NEED to do in order for a god to love and accept you.

Whatever makes you happy. I'm not going to try and sway you one way or another. Your faith is something you need to handle yourself.

Q: Why does everyone think you HAVE to believe in something? Do you feel it's wrong to not put faith in a religion? I'm not religious in the tiniest bit. I know some people think that you never know what you're missing out on until you try it. However, I've never even cared or have been concerned with trying to find religion in my life. Why is religion so important?
Religion certainly isn't a requirement. Some people just feel more complete if they have faith in something, something to look forward to such as Heaven as opposed to the grim scientific facts about death. I don't think it's wrong to not put faith into a religion; I'm an Atheist myself & I honestly think that religion is more of a problem than lack of religion. To each his own. I personally feel that religion is a bunch of crap, and I don't mean that to offend anybody. There are so many conflicting religions in this world & it's simply impossible for all of them to be right, so how do you decide which one is accurate and put your faith in it? It's simply not logical to me.

Q: hello. im a muslim and ever since 9/11 i know there has been a lot of sterotypes on muslims. Very bad ones. i had a lot of racism especially during that year at which i was 10 years old. people would stare at me and my sisters and be like go back to your country. now i want to know what are peoples views on islam and muslims?
I honestly don't know enough about Islam and Muslims to formulate an opinion. I believe that too many people are uneducated on the subject, which results in them being complete jackasses and telling you to "go back to your country". I've learned a bit about it from a distant friend & I'd be interested in learning more. I think some parts of the religion are simply bizarre, but that goes for any religion & I'd certainly never tell anyone to "go back to your country".

Q: Do you believe that "God" has already planned out our destiny, or do you believe we make our own destiny?


And do you believe everything happens for a reason, or do you feel that's just some clever line a thinker thought up to try to reduce the amount of stress and anger in our lives?
I don't believe in a god. Any decision we make is our own. Every person charts his own path in life; there is no predestined course for anyone.

I say everything happens for a reason, but it's just a saying as far as I'm concerned.

Q: Okay. Long story short. I have religious Mormon friend. Religious as in very, very religious. Anyhow, we got into a discussion tonight at "impure thoughts" He seems to think it's a "selfish want" to think impurely about others. I said that it's impossible to be rid of them, that by repressing it them you are not getting rid of them, just concealing them and they will just build up. I said that what you need to do is deal with them and get them out of your system.

Now I feel really bad about the things I said. I guess it's because I should respect the fact he's pure rather than encourage him not to be. lol. I feel bad for him as I feel he is a little misguided and placing unnecessary restraints on himself. Does anyone agree with me on what I said to him? Is it impossible to debate with religious people? At the time I seemed to make a lot of sense. But now I'm thinking and maybe he is right. Should we avoid discussions like this in the future? Does someone with some experience with religion have an religious answer to this?

Thanks.


You didn't say anything wrong in my opinion. Just because (I'm assuming here from what you said) you're not a devoutly religious person doesn't mean that you should keep your thoughts to yourself to avoid stepping on other people's toes.

You weren't encouraging him to be impure, you were just expressing your beliefs-- & since you weren't being disrespectful, there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. If you feel that further discussions may jeopardize your friendship, then perhaps you should refrain from them in the future. But as long as you can both remain open-minded, discussions like these can be educational for both of you. You can learn to better understand the restraints he's under & respect them regardless of whether or not he agrees with them, & he can learn that he's entitled to feel as he wish, but he shouldn't judge anyone if they have "impure thoughts".

Q: I was looking through a few questions on religion (Not a darn clue why, I just was) and I was reading a question about a girl who wanted to become Buddist.

An answer she recieved made me a little upset. This person that answered kept saying how she was choosing the wrong religion and that being Buddist is wrong.

I've noticed things like this before, strong Christians (yes, it is mostly Christians) criticizing other religions. They will rant on and on about how it's the wrong religion.

What is so wrong with believing in Buddah? Why do you have to criticize people who do not believe in God? We have the right to choose our religion and the right to choose no religion at all.

Why do you believe that your religion is the only "right" religion? This has been bothering me for a while.

I really don't want any Christians on this site to feel that I am directing this ONLY at you. But what I've seen on this site about 90% of the people criticizing people for their religion are strong Christians. So, I'm just basing my question on the majority.

I'm sorry if this question has offended anyone.
It's unfair of you to say that it's mostly Christians. Perhaps in your experiences it's mostly Christians, but people can be close-minded regardless of their religion.

As for the rest, I don't understand why people do that. I don't like the concept of religion overall because it teaches people to be close-minded, but perhaps my Atheist beliefs have led me to feel that way. It's confusing for religious people, because in church & in anything associated with church, it's shoved down their throats that they're right & everyone is wrong. I imagine that it would be hard to hear that from your beliefs & then still remain open-minded.

I went off a bit there, but I think the problem isn't people, but religion in itself. If more religions educated people in religion while also informing them that there is nothing wrong with opposing beliefs, the world would be a better place. But that would make the foundation of that religion seem rocky, so really, there's no way to win here.

Q: Is masturbation biblically wrong? What's your view on it?
I believe it's considered wrong in the Christian religion. I've heard that there's something in the Bible about "not spilling your seed" but that's just hearsay so I can't say for certain.

I personally see nothing wrong with it. There's nothing wrong with exploring your body & it's better to masturbate than to have sex every time you feel a sexual urge.

bio
kailey
My name is Kailey. I'm 17 years old & a senior at a high school in Massachusetts. I'm told that I'm mature for my age, but I'll let you be the judge of that. I love giving advice, but I'll tell you the way I see it, so you may not always like my answers. I especially like giving relationship advice. I don't claim to have all the answers, but I've been in a relationship for almost 2 years now and I feel as though I can give good advice on the subject.

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