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I'm a student to the world. my mother was a philosopher my father was a biker and me, I'm just experiencing life one day at a time. I give the best advice I can think of unless I'm 100% that the question has be fully answered. I want everyone to know that I'm not here for popularity, but if someone misses something and I notice then I will submit it (giving due credit to previous Advice givers). I don't like repeating things and will try my hardest not to.

Thank you.
Gender: Male
Location: Canada
Occupation: Cook
Age: 18
Member Since: November 16, 2006
Answers: 96
Last Update: March 5, 2012
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ok well im going out with this girl who i was good friends with before hand...because we went out before then broke up then became really good friends then decided to go out again

but im really confused because im not sure how to go further than kissing with her or what she expects from me. because shes generally the type who likes to go further pretty quickly. shes nineteen by the way.but i dont know how or if she will find it weird because we are friends. or how to break that awkwardness. how do i know if she wants to? when we make out its pretty intense and stuff and she usually puts her leg right up against my crotch but i really dont know. any sugestions? or how i could tell if she even wanted to? because i wouldn want to if she didnt if you get me.

thanks (link)
I know how you can find out right away if she wants to go further. As soon as you mentioned "...when we make out its pretty intense and stuff..." then it became simple. Now that you two are that far into your relationship, you want to get more serious. So what you do is talk or do what ever it is you do until you start making out. While your making out make sure either she's on top of you or vise versa. Casually move your hand under her shirt so that your skin is touching hers and move it up to her bra strap...provided she's wearing a bra...Now that your here, hand moving upward, start looking for signs of discomfort, a weird face, maybe her hand pushes down on yours or she might even tell you to stop. If you see anything like this stop and pull your hand away because this means "no" or "not yet" However if you don't see this is means "keep going" or "I think your right, lets keep going" and from there you should be set. As a caution: always keep an eye out for discomfort when moving on and it could prolong your relationship (speaking from experience, 3 years and many more to come)

Good luck, sorry that was so long.
Hope this helps o^-^o


Ok, so around next week this guy who i know and like is going to ask me out. We've been crushing on each other since spring break. he's not allowed to date untill he's in highschool, but i know for a fact that he used to screw around with other girls before we met each other. So pretty soon we're going to start dating and he'll be my first boyfriend and i'm really nervous. Just a little while ago i learned that he's fingered a girl and gotten hand and blow jobs before. I'm worried that since he'd be my first boyfriend that i won't be able to...well, that he'd expect me to do things more experinced girls he knows do. I really like him but am afraid that he as soon as we get together he'll be all disappointed that i'm not as experienced. please,could you give me some advice? (link)
I find the greatest pleasure in a relationship, physically and mentally, comes from learning. Sure you've heard from other people....or maybe even him that he's got a little bit of experience, so what? This is nothing to be concerned of, just pay attention to what he likes, facial expressions are most common. But don't forget to notice what he doesnt like and move on. If he looks bored or in pain try something new...unless he likes pain, lol. But for the most part, relax, this is a learning experience, you'll both enjoy it.

Hope this helps o^-^o

Im a 20 yr old female and I have been with my girlfriend for over 2 years now. We have been living together for the past year. We have a pretty good relationship and for the most part, im happy. The main problem is I constantly get irritated because things arent "fair" or "equal". For example, my girlfriend will ask me to get her a drink and then shell ask me to get her a snack and then she'll ask me to get her a blanket and then she'll ask me to take the dogs out. And I'll do it all. But then I ask her to get me a drink and she will flat out say no and wont do it. And then I start getting irritated and angry because I feel like why should I do it for you when you wouldnt do it for me. She says I shouldnt expect things in return for the favors I do. I get so torn over it because part of me feels like shes right and its not right for me to get mad I should just do it because I love her and I shouldnt expect her to do it for me in return. But then a minute later i think that its crap and its not fair at all and if she loves me then she should do it for me. I would just like some opinions and advice because I feel like if I could get over my issue with this then our relationship would be so much better. Thanks alot. (link)
There is always a solution to a problem. In this case it seems, not to offend, that there may be a lack of communication in your relationship. Now that we have identified the problem, the solution: A simple discussion as per what has been bothering you. Don't sugar coat it, just tell her how it is and how it is making you feel. After this discussion your GF should reply with "oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize this was how you felt, I'll try to be more aware of this issue in the future." Once you have made it this far, to encourage her and to test her listening capabilities, casually ask her to grab you, say, a glass of water. If she responds to your disliking then another talk may be needed to improve her listening capabilities. Please use this only as a guidline and feel free to change or modify anything in here to suit your liking.
I hope this helps, o^-^o

what do you love most about girls? :]
just wonderinqqqqqq boyss only answerr pleasee (link)
each boy is different, my preferences consist of an athletic body the type of clothing worn and if you have it vanilla body spray or purfume/males are very attracted to the way a woman smells. Hope this could help o^-^o

Hi please help

My girlfriend and i are about to get married. This week her ex boyfriend contact her. He needs help. He has been lying to everyone. He is at a stage where he want to end his life. My girlfriend decides that she want to help him. She feels sorry for him. In four years he has had no contact with her. Why now. What should i do. (link)
My opinion would be to start by alerting the autorities of this/if YOU feel its is a serious issue. Normally, if he is ligitimate, he'll reach out to the people he once knew and possibly loved to see if anyone cares about him. If your gf is really inclined to help her ex I would say stick by her side, try and help her all you can and things will pan out in the end. Hope this could help o^-^o

I Have had the same boyfriend for ggoing on 3 years now.we stay together and everyting but why do i feel so lonely.i just recently lost my job so i'm home alone all day.he's off to work at about 3 in the morning and he's home no later than 8 in the evening.when he come in i'm so excited but he comes in say a few thingss and then right back outbthe door to the store or something and then when he gets back he's outside talking to one of his friends for an hour or two and then when he comes in he's tired he ask me for his dinner he eats take a shower and get in bed..and then he hollars for me to come to get in bed so we can have sex and then he turns over and go to sleep..thats everyday we don't spend any time together..we just got rid of my car and for a long time it was only my car we had and now he have his car i'm really stuck inside he takes his keys to work but his co worker come to get him everyday..But when I had my car he had an extra set of keys...what is it? am i just over reacting? or is he trying to keep me inside and away form everybody..i'm already in another state away from my family and he doing thin purposely?? (link)
I had a friend that did this to his girlfriend. I'll tell you what I told her "you can't stay in the house all day, its not healthy." In a relationship there is jelousy, but people sometimes over react and become scared. Confront him on this matter, let him know how you feel and that You need more attention. Because if you think about it a man joins a relationship to care for the woman, pamper her and spend every possible moment with her. I see my gf every time that I have time. Just let him know how you feel, he has to understand that you need a life too. Hope this helped o^-^o

I'll be turning 17 in 11 days, and my boyfriend of almost half a year (our year and a half is the day after my birthday), needs some help as to what to get me. I really don't care about it being a surprise for me, as long as he feels confident with giving me the gift. What are a few things I can hint towards when he asks me what I want? I already have a necklace, earrings, and a small ring, so preferably no jewelry. Just practical stuff really. (link)
birthdays are always hard to decide for. I think you should ask yourself "what do I need?" this may help you figure out the answer whether its a new belt or outfit you wanted or maybe you just want a romantic night out to get away from your annoying sibling (speaking from experience). perhaps your into video games and electronics, theres an accessory that you really want but either don't have time or money to get it. Or lets say you like music, is there a favorite band you could recommend to him, maybe a concert you wanted to go to or a CD you wanted. A year ago i just made my gf a cheesecake for her bday. Maybe get your bf to make up a little coupon booklet with things like, 1 25 minute back message, or 1 free study only night.

Hope I could help o^_^o
& good luck

my boyfriend (weve been dating about a month) has TONS of posters of halk naked, playboy girls all around his bedroom. Like, "hot" girls in skimpy bikins and sexual poses. and of course, way more gorgeous and curvy than regular girls. the posters make me so uncomfortable. he also sometimes talks about other hot celebrities and such around me. it somehow makes me feel, like, not good enough. ill never look like one of those girls on his walls and it makes me feel so horrible. what should i do about this? (link)
Its a mans nature to always look for the most attractive woman they can lay eyes on. Its nothing that should be taken offense to. If you think about it this way, a persons brain is devided up into sections, each section has a certain set of chemicals that get released for certain reasons, brain wave lengths n' stuff like that. Anyway, when a guy sees a hot woman it automatically goes to his mind and he can't help but say something a memory can also spark this. This is not meant to hurt anyone its just the way a guy is.

Hope I could help o^-^o

The boy I really like comes to my b ball court everyday.If he kissed another girl,what would that mean?This didnt happen to me im just wondering because i dont want him to kiss another girl because I REALLY like him alot! (link)
I think you need to tell him you like him before another girl comes along. This way he can have time to respond if he is thinking about another girl. It also may mean that you would become a priority over other girls and it would also decrease the chances of there ever being another one.

Hope I could help o^-^o & good luck


this guy.
we talk like every night on the phone
the most weve talked was from 10 pm to 4 am or so
this is how it goes.
weve never told each other that we like each other
he gave me a poem that said he loved me
i never really responded to that.
is that bad? =\

i tell him that this bitchy girl wanting to hook up with him makes me really mad and jealous.
he stopped talking to her.

he always makes me feel better

and then at our dance we danced every slow song and every fast song together. and during one slow song he made a joke about this girl and i let go of him but he pulled me into him and i like melted. and i was like oh you have no idea how many stories i could tell you about that and he said if theyre not about you i dont want to hear them

hes great, but hes a male. (no offense boys)
i want to know if hes playing me
because it seems way to good to be true that hed like me
im not exactly the hottest girl ever
but he tells me that im attractive and that he likes to talk to me

does he like me or not??
whats a casual way of finding out without flat asking?>

I don't think you need to ask if he likes you. He's given you enough to determine 100% that that is the case, however i think he's waiting. He probably needs to know that you like him before he wants to make any move. Show him the dearest affection, but try not to be clingy, idk some guys don't like that too much. Another thing you can do is come right out and tell him that you like him, like more than a friend. The action he took after this would determine whether he needed that little extra step.

Hope I could help o^-^o and good luck

sorry if this is long
so im a junior and since freshman year ive been friends with this guy who's a year older. this year is his last and i've had this small crush on him ever since i first met him. hes just so irresistible! i cant really explain it, but he just makes you feel good when u talk to him. lately it's gotten really bad though and i've realized that if i dont do anything now, it will be too late! now for the hard part. First, we do NOT match. I could never picture myself with him, yet i want to. but he's just so cute and we have things in common and stuff, just physically we dont match. also, since we met its been like a constant game! we talk for a while, then flirt, then just as things are about to turn serious we ignore each other...then the cycle begins again! hes SOOO flirty and txts me in the mornings and at night, calls me gorgeous and sweet, and we've hung out a couple of times and flirted like crazy. hes really hard to read though. i just figured that if something was to happen it would have already happened right!?? but then again i keep hearing he likes me from A LOT of ppl. WHAT is going on!??? lately i cant stop thinking about going crazy! HELP!!!!!??? (link)
first off let me say, your not going crazy. However if you feel you are then maybe you should just confront him? I know its easier said than done but whats the worst that could possibly happen? Don't think about that, think more along the lines of, whats the best that could happen. Here's an example, say Kari likes this guy thats really cute and flirty, she gathers up the courage to go up to him and says that she likes him. he turns to her and says "sorry, i like this other girl" however they still stay friends. A week later Kari gets asked out by his even hotter and sweeter brother and they live happily ever after. All I'm saying is don't be afraid to tell someone how you feel cuz it can only hurt you.

Hope I could help o^-^o
& good luck

ok so im 16/f
i dont really like anyone right now, but i have slight feelings for this one kid (tom-16) who i already had a kinda thing with. and i dont realy kno this other kid (josh-18) anymore but i use to like him a lot.

tom and i only talk wen i take the initiative to go sit w/ him. but he always talks about me and openly stares at me and crap like that. its kinda obvious he has feelings for me. but he wont do anything about it except act like a little 3rd grader and it is so completely annoying.

josh on the other hand, i use to like, so im pretty sure if i hung out with him i could potentially get feelings for him again, cuz he's stil in the very back of my mind. and josh is the one who is texting me all the time to hang out, but i always have had sumthing to do.

so im not sure what i should do.. b/c i want tom more than josh but if he isn't going to do anything then i dont wanna waste my time. and i sorta like josh but he is the one who is going after me, even still after ive turned down about 4 offers from him so far. so that means he really wants me.

i just want to make sure that i am going to make the right decision, because i personally dont want to have to chase after guys, its stupid and i just dont have the time or reasoning to, so they can come after me if they want me and that's truly how i feel. but im wondering what you think about the whole situation...
Being a guy myself I always had it in my head to go after the girl, not the other way around. However, if I were you, I'd just go up to tom and tell him the truth. Whats the worst that could happen? Well, he could say no, after that, it would make you free to accept other's invitations without having to worry "what if he likes me?"

Hope I could help o^-^o
& good luck

okay, me and my boyfriend went out for 6 monthes and he broke up with me on our 6monthanniversary. i really loved him. like alot alot alot. and he broke up with me because i was supposidly being mean but i really don't think i was, and he also liked another girl. 2 monthes later he asked her, no they have been going out for almost a monthe on the 14th, i still really like him. and when i see him i cry and i usually don't cry infront of people unless i'm close with them. he says he still wants to be friends but he won't talk to me unless i text him and i don't that much because i don't want to annoy him. what do i do? :/ (link)
People spend their whole lives looking for that special someone. If this guy only waits 2 months before he has another gf then he's not the guy for you. A lot of guys say they love a woman but only say it to make her feel better, and in most cases it works and the woman lowers a lot of barriers. Most guys love control, most women love security, forget about this guy and go on with your daily life. If you have problems letting go, bury yourself in a hobby or homework or something you love doing.

Hope I could help. o^-^o

How do I tell my boyfriend I want time with him thats not forced time?

Its hard to explain.But im going to try.

We are always hanging out. But a lot of the time its like forced. Like hes going to help me study or me help him. Or the biggest reason his mom watches my brothers. Or I have to watch my brothers and I need help.And its not always forced though and sometimes when its not forced all he does is play video games and i watch then we have sex. I want to watch a movie or play the game with him-nothing forced. But im not sure how to tell him that.
So how do i tell him that?
And thanx in advance!
it sounds a lot like you're worrying too much about everything and just need to get away from it all with your bf. I suggest a night out, go to a movie or theme park. Or if you're in the country or wanna go somewhere quieter, go on a picnic to your favorite park. Seems like you just want to relax. Do something fun, tell him you want to play video games with him. I never hurt to ask right? So why not say to him whats on your mind?

Hope I could help o^-^o

ok well i used to have this boyfriend and we broke up last december.. soo thats a really long time ago.. soo now i really really like him , and i really want to tell him but i dont think hell like me back, we dont talk that much and more but i really miss him alot.. hes in all of my classes so i dont want to embaress myself..

help please?? what should i say? and how can i get him to like me again

any help would be great (link)
Honesty is often the best way. Isolate him from his friends in the hall or class during a break and ask him how he feels. Remember, you can't force him to love you and have to respect his wishes and move on if he doesn't want to get together again.
Hope this helped and good luck o^-^o

how do you get a shy guy to become sexual with you? like are there any moves or hints i can make? (link)
Honesty is the only answer if he is shy. I'm 17/m and very shy, the only way my gf managed to get me to ask her out is by out right telling me that she wanted to go out and i still thought about it. Most men do not look for hints or suggestions, they either know or don't know. Be straight forward with him and you will get the answer you are looking for.

Hope I could help o^-^o

This is gonna be long, sorry!!!
Theres this guy. Let's call him Jim. He's been one of my best friends since i was about 3. It's because his dad used to work with my mom. his parents are from england and have heavy british accents. however, Jim doesnt. I used to sleep over at his house, i almost used to live there. his sister, (lets call her Polly) now lives in London. Jim goes to London to visit his grandparents every summer. Oh, did I mention that i am in looove with anything british? I want to go to London so badly and a british accent is one of the hottest things i have ever heard. Jim is kind of short and i am really super tall. idc about that though... anyways, i dont see him a lot anymore because we go to different schools. Also his dad doesnt work with my mom any more. i think i have a crush on him... i only see him every tuesday when i go to church school. i want to look really good when i go, and i get all nervous when i get around him. but somehow i still think of him as my best buddy jim. im not sure if it actually is a crush. actually it seems that he has a crush on me! i was talking to him and my other friend Darren one tuesday and Jim commented that my voice was hoarse (i had a throatache that day). and Darren was teasing Jim saying, "Yeah, Jim, i bet you dream about her voice!" Jim was blushing and telling Darren to shut up. I was laughing and blushing a little too. So im not sure if i see him as a potential boyfriend or just a friend.... thanks for reading all of that and thanks for your answers in advance!!! (link)
It sounds like a crush, if you pursue this guy it could develop into a serious relationship. I'd go for it and hope for the best, he sounds like a really cool guy. Since you've spent so much time over at his house then you probably know his parents really well which would be a bonus if you dated him. I found that the hardest part in dating my GF was getting her family to like me.
Hope I could help o^-^o

its my best guy friend. he's the most amazing guy in the world. he has the most respect for women i've ever seen in a guy his age. we're good friends and he has no idea i like him. he does these little things that make me want him even more, for example if i'm upset and about to cry about something he holds my face and presses his forehead up against mine and just tells me not to worry because he loves me. but he means it as a friend. when we're that close i've always wanted to kiss him but here's the problem. he likes one of my friends and she likes him back. he's planning on asking her out and being as sweet as he is, this is how he's going to do it. he's surprising her at work with a rose and is going to ask her out. to make my situation worse, i'm the one who told him exactly what to say and he was really appreciative about it. i was happy that i made him happy but i was sad that he was going to ask her out. they're not even going out yet and they fight everyday. i know that when they start going out and he has problems with her he's going to come back to me. so how can i show him i dont want to be his therapist anymore i want to be his girl?!! (link)
Sometimes telling him exactly how you feel can be the best answer. This would be one of those times, but, only do it when you know he's about to come back otherwise it might look like you set him up with her for him to get hurt. sit down with him and, little by little, tell him how you feel. Make sure he gets a clear picture because, as a man, i know that not all of us can understand signs.

Hope I could help o^-^o

Ok well i have two best friends. Let's call them Anna and Austin. Well, I've liked Austin for the longest time and he likes me. Like we reeeeally like each other. The only problem is that our best friend Anna, who I've been best friends with for 10 years, likes Austin too. And me & Austin really act like we're dating. We just don't kiss in front of Anna. And she's telling us that if we want to be together, then we should because she'll get over it. But I can tell that she's lying. And I really want to go out with him and actually have the promise of a relationship, but i don't want to hurt Anna. And some of my other friends that I've talked to about this situation, keep telling us to go out for goodness sake because they've known for months that something was going to happen. And know its finally so ridiculously close, and the biggest road block is in the way. I just want to know what to do because I can't wait until Anna gets over him to go out with him, because that could take months. Help?!?! (link)
Go out with him. Your friend already told you that she would get over him. The most likely thing is that you could grow a little farther apart but since you and this guy already hang out with her it could strengthen your relationships. There are times when to think about others but do this for yourself and you'll feel much better.

Hope I could help o^-^o

17/m If i'm a virgin, how long will i last my first time

It varies from person to person (like the other guy said) due to habits, however, I would like to add that masturbation can cause you to last longer. I know this from personal experience. Ever since I was 12 I've been a chronic masturbater and I find it hard to have sex for less than an hour unless I haven't done anything in a week. So remember this, everyone is different, always look for ways to better yourself.

Hope I could help o^-^o

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