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June 18, 2009Answers:
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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
advice
17/f
I don't know if this is weird or normal, maybe someone can tell me. After every break up with a boyfriend I can't stand the sight of a guy for months, which is probably normal, but then I start looking at girls and finding them really attractive. I've always considered myself straight, and I'm never attracted to girls, only in the months following a break up. Then I go back to being my straight self not even looking at girls, and I can't even think of being involved with one. Maybe it's the anger I have after being lied to and dumped by so many guys, I can't stand the sight of one and instead wanna go to the girls. I'm really confused if someone could explain why I feel that way or if they've gone through the same thing and it's normal I would appreciate it. Thank you
From my none medical point of view I think your normal.
My wife and I know a couple of women, one of whom is her boss, who after her divorce went lesbian or bi as she will on occasion have sex with a man. She lives in a committed relationship with another divorced women and they both have their children living with them.
As for their occasion liaisons with me? They both say they occasionally fell the need that only a male can fulfil. But as a steady diet, after the hurt of their marriages and divorces they have no desire for a relationship with men.
I tell you this as an example of how your feeling from my point of view are to me, very normal and nothing to be concerned about. Break ups hurt and to look for love in what you are feeling are all the wrong places are really not wrong.
Then there is the fact that you are only 17. Still a sexually confusing time for many teenagers. You did not say if you have ever had a sexual relationship only that you felt attracted to other girls post break up.
To me this is normal. Your hurting and your attraction to girls during this period is a safe haven; one were you feel you will not be hurt again. As the hurt goes away you are more willing to dive back into the pool of boys and the desire for female companionship goes away. I would not worry. Just enjoy being you.
(Rating: 5) Thank you so much adviceman, you hit the nail on the head in the last paragraph I think that's exactly what is going on. Thank you you really helped me