Member Since: July 20, 2006
Answers: 188
Last Update: July 29, 2011
Visitors: 9169
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I'm 20/f, dating a 20/m.
My boyfriend is 6'2" tall, and he's about 210 pounds, which I think is pretty normal. I've never thought he was chubby or even "teddy bear" sized, just that he wasn't exactly thin or scrawny. I know he was a lot heavier when he was younger, but by the time I met him he'd worked a lot of the weight off, so his weight looks to be about average.
Suddenly, in the past two months, he's started talking about how much he HATES the way he looks, how he "better get used to not liking who he is", and how he's upset because "he'll never get to where he wants to be", physically speaking. He joined a gym (I joined with him, because I want to start eating better and excercising), but he's constantly talking about calories and pounds lost ALL THE TIME.
In the one month that we've been going to the gym, he's stopped eating all junk food and candy, and has stopped drinking EVERYTHING except water and skim milk. He's lost almost 20 pounds in the last month, and he's still saying he hates how he looks.
I tell him I love his body and that I'm really attracted to him physically (it's true), but he brushes me off. He calls himself chubby and fat and he gets so upset that he won't even talk to me about it. It's like he refuses to believe me.
Tonight he said he wasn't leaving the gym until he burned 1000 calories, and he keeps saying things like "i'm just going through things" and "I didn't know this would be so hard". I'm REALLY scared.
What can I do? I'm crying just because I'm so scared and worried about his health, safety, and happiness. PLEASE HELP my boyfriend :( (link)
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Wow , that's not too good. First off , please try to get him away from those thoughts , get him to go somewhere with you. Even if you get too much into his private life go to his parents talk to him about it or go to his friends and ask them to sit down and talk to him or even you talk to him and see where it goes that is not going to good. You need to really show him how you feel maybe he will see how bad it's getting. Talk to him tell him he looks amazing try to boost him up , try to say what a guy wants to hear the most , try getting him to talk about everything except that , occassionally take out some food and show him or something. Don't watch him do this , he should not be so horrible in it , try to find out why he is this. My advice to you is go get help either parents yours or his, friends , family, doctors , locals , uhm or even personal trainers and also , keep trying to boost his energy up show him what he's doing isn't the best. Prove he's worth a lot more.
Good luck : )
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