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I am an inspired 16 year old who is looking for a career in giving advice. I have been around the block a few times and I am an expert on a wide variety of personal topics. I'm unique, outgoing and I love art and music. I also enjoy playing my guitar.

advice

Okay well Im 16 years old and I dont know who my real father is. I know his name is Jim and he lives in west virginia. I dont like asking my mom because everytime I ask she gets this look on her face and trys to change the subject as if she were mad or something. I dont want to make her upset or mad but it feels like theres a wholllle other life that i dont know of! I mean its not one of those things where "she doesnt know who my dad is" she knows but wont talk about him. But there are days where I am completey upset cuz I just start thinking of him even though I dont know who he is."does he even know about me? does he not love me? was i not what he planned on having?" so many questions! Now the TRUE question is when im 18 should I ask my mom then go and try to find him or do you think it happend for a reason?!?! should I just let it go and live with all the pain? im so lost and heart broken. i mean i survived 16 years without a true dad but it hurt so bad excpecially because i never talked about him. What do you think I should do?

I can imagine how hard it must be for you to deal with this constant mystery. I was thankful to have both my parents growing up, though now I often take having my father around for granite. I think you should, depending on the situation and relationship you have with your mom, sit down and pick a right moment to talk to her about your dad, no secrets. Tell her that your old enough to handle the truth, no matter how hard it may be. Maybe you could write him a letter and send him a picture of you, and if he doesn't respond, he's not worth your time. If your family is happy now, maybe your mom doesn't want to bring an old memory back in to the picture. Let me know how it goes. Good luck

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(Rating: 5) Thanks so much for your time. I will deffinatly think about the letter after I get her to talk. My mom has a b/f of 8 years and things are bad. she wants to leave him so bad but we cant leave cuz they had a child mathew who is my half brother so its not like our family life is good either. But I dont want my little brother to go through all this stuff having to switch on and off between parents> its just way to hard but thanks a lot. i GREATLY appreciate it
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